The Devil’s Rain (1975)

The Devil's Rain There have been films about earthquakes, airplane disasters and blazing infernos… but there has never been anything like THE DEVIL’S RAIN! … or nothing like this fluffy, silly Satanic horror movie that only could have come out from the mid ’70s. Horns up!

 

Just to make no mistake what subject matter we’re getting ourselves into, the film opens with tasty hell paintings by Bosch over the intro credits. We then get thrown right into, yes you guessed it, a rainstorm where Mark Preston (William Shatner) is looking for his father. After he gets home to his mother Emma and some other old guy named John, his father, Steve, suddenly shows up outside the house, looking like a melted hobo freak from Tromaville. Steve has escaped from the Satanic cult leader Jonathan Corbis to warn the Preston family about a mysterious book, which Corbis expect to be delivered to him at a place called Redstone. Steve mumbles In nomine Satanas before he melts away to a small puddle in front of Mark and his wife.

 

We learn that the Prestons have hidden a Satanic Bible for generations, and now they order Mark to just give it to Corbis. Nah! Instead, he loads his gun and gets ready to hunt down this Corbis guy to blow his brains out, because who wouldn’t. If it was that simple. A voodoo doll is nailed to the steering wheel on his truck. Uh-oh. Mark then hears screaming from the house where he finds John hanging upside-down with a bloody face. The house has also been completely trashed, as if a tornado of poltergeists had swarmed by. Emma is gone and seems to have been kidnapped by Corbis’s cult. All this happens in just a seconds. Talk about some vulgar display of power. Eleven minutes in and the film is already all over the place. Mark finally takes the roadtrip to Redstone which looks like an abandoned old ghost town and maybe an old set for a western movie. After Mark eventually gets captured by the Satanic cult, we then switches over to Mark’s brother Tom (Tom Skerritt) and his wife Julie who’s a psychic of some sort. She can see into the past, or something like that. Tom get the news that his brother is missing and the search begins in the Mexican desert. Good luck and remember to drink a plenty of water.

 

According to the original poster for The Devil’s Rain, it can promise us Absolutely the most incredible ending of any motion picture ever!” Yes, with an exclamation point. No clickbait bullshit, because hear this: the last five minutes or so has more gooey and grotesque melting body horror than The Incredible Melting Man (1977) and Body Melt (1993) combined. Not too shabby for a half-obscure ’70s low-budget horror. And look out for John Travolta’s very first screen presence, which he’s not much proud of as he only remembers it as a terrible movie. Travolta has been in way, way, waaay worse movies than this, and that’s a fact. Then we have the actual Mister Satanist himself, Anton LaVey, the founder of the Church of Satan who worked as technical advisor on the film and had a small cameo as the The High Priest. The chanting we hear from the Corbis cult are words from The Satanic Bible, yes the one and only that LaVey wrote and published in 1967. And with that being said, Ernest Borgnine, who plays the cult leader, would never be in a film that deals with devils and satanism again after the film was plagued with eerie incidents and accidents. That’s a shame, since he seemed to be having a ball playing the over-the-top demonic cartoonish villain with the most evil psychotic grin that only Kenneth Copeland could match. His presence in full demonic form is nothing but mesmerizing where he looks like a mix of Ron Perlman from Hellboy and the Beast from Beauty and the Beast. Delightful stuff!

 

But the one that didn’t smile in the slightest, was director Robert Fuest, who was on the brink of a nervous breakdown while filming somewhere in bumfuck nowhere in a dusty hellhole in Mexico with very limited resources. Rumors say that the film was financed with mafia money and several actors didn’t get paid, including Ernest Borgnine. A chaotic shitshow, in other words. After a disastrous theatrical release which garnered mostly negative reviews and earned a spot on Roger Ebert’s Most Hated movies list, Fuest was reduced to spending the rest of his film career on obscure TV shows and even more obscure TV movies. It wasn’t until 1982 that he got his final theatrical release, which was the Greek soft porn Aphrodite. Showbiz…what can you say. Leaving on that note, The Devil’s Rain may sound like one of the worst movies ever made. I wouldn’t say it’s even close. It’s a flawed incoherent mess for sure, but an entertaining incoherent mess with some solid production values, vibrant look, a nice n’ eerie vibe, a cool-looking villain and, a glimpse of the origin of the iconic Michael Myer’s mask… and, of course,  lots of melting satanists. The only thing missing is a nude woman ready to be sacrificed on an altar, but oh well, not everyone can be Nude for Satan, I guess.

 

The Devil's Rain The Devil's Rain The Devil's Rain

 

 

Director: Robert Fuest
Writers: Gabe Essoe, James Ashton, Gerald Hopman
Country & year: Mexico/USA, 1975
Actors: Ernest Borgnine, Eddie Albert, Ida Lupino, William Shatner, Keenan Wynn, Tom Skerritt, Joan Prather, Woodrow Chambliss, John Travolta, Claudio Brook, Lisa Todd, Anton LaVey
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0072869/

 

Tom Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

Jaws 2 (1978)

Jaws 2It is now four years since a great white shark terrorized the villagers and tourists on Amity Island. After Chief Martin Brody and his companions finally managed to kill it and give the seagulls a nice sushi-buffet in the same go, everything has been fine. Of course something must happen to disturb the peace. Two scuba divers are photographing the wreckage of the Orca, and another great white shark appears and kills them both. Uh-oh, here we go again! Already the next day the shark is out for more blood, and kills a water skier who manages to burn the shark’s face by using a flare gun in self defense. It all ends with both skier and the boat pilot getting killed, and we now have four victims in just two days.

 

Just like last time, no real evidence of anything being caused by a shark is clear from the start, but when Brody finds an orca carcass in the beach with some severe bite marks on it, nothing is going to convince him we’re not in for yet another round of shark terror. As bodies start piling up, the Mayor is once again more worried about the island’s tourism. Money comes before everything when it comes to these guys. Brody, suspected of being mentally unstable after the incident four years ago is not taken seriously, and he grows more and more concerned for the safety of his family. He forbids his 17-year old son, Mike, from going out in the water. We all know how that goes…tell a teenager what they aren’t allowed to do, and you can bet that this will be on their to-do list pretty soon. And sure enough, Mike goes sailing with his friends and even brings his younger brother Sean with them, mostly because the little bugger saw him sneaking out and threatened to tattle on his big bro. Ah, younger siblings…such fun. And we all know that this sailing trip will be just another setup for additional meals to the big fish.

 

Jaws 2 is the 1978 sequel to the success of Jaws from 1975, a success which was of course bound to spew out a few sequels afterwards. And just like the first film, the production was troubled. The first director, John D. Hancock, proved to not be the right guy for directing this one, and was replaced with the French director Jeannot Szwarc. Steven Spielberg was of course not interested as he thought making a sequel to anything is just a cheap carny trick and apparently didn’t even bother to respond when the producers asked him. He also admitted later on that the production hell of the first film scared him from trying to reprise the ordeal…

 

Once again, mechanical sharks were constructed for the film, where special mechanical effects supervisor Robert Mattey and Roy Arbogast used the same body mold from the first film. Why they didn’t use the originals, you may ask? Well, they had started to rust and rot away after being stored behind sheds in the lower lot of Universal Studios. So that’s where the creation of Bruce 2 came into place. Martha’s Vineyard once again became the filming location for the town scenes, and many of the locals were cast as extras. The beach scenes were shot at Navarre Beach in Florida. John Williams, who won an Academy Award for Best Original Score for the first film, also returned to score. Jaws 2 also became considerably more expensive, and cost $30 million to produce, more than three times the first movie…but hey, they knew this would be an immediate success anyway since loads of people would watch it purely because of the first film, and they were right as the box office was $208.9 million. Not as much as the first movie, but still a success.

 

Now, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that this movie is nowhere near as good as the first one, but to be honest that’s mostly the deal with sequels (with some very few exceptions). That being said, it’s still entertaining and it’s fun to see a movie playing a little around with the so-called aftermath and of course focusing on some of the same characters. The pacing is not quite as tight compared to the first, and with the same town and setting you can’t help but feeling that it’s a little repetitive.

 

The shark itself is still an obvious threat, but there isn’t that feeling of a constantly threatening atmosphere as in the first. It ventures more into pure creature-feature territory where the shark is more monstrous and often a bit over-the-top. I mean, there’s a scene where it’s attacking a helicopter…something that’s right out of a monster movie. But Bruce 2 is pretty alright (whom fans have nicknamed Brucette since the shark is a female in this movie). Definitely some fun to be had here, just don’t expect a movie on the same level as the first. So, while Jaws 2 doesn’t have nearly enough bite as the first one, it’s still a decent sequel worth watching.

 

Jaws 2 Jaws 2

 

Director: Jeannot Szwarc
Writers: Carl Gottlieb, Howard Sackler
Country & year: USA, 1978
Actors: Roy Scheider, Lorraine Gary, Murray Hamilton, Joseph Mascolo, Jeffrey Kramer, Collin Wilcox Paxton, Ann Dusenberry, Mark Gruner, Barry Coe, Susan French, Gary Springer, Donna Wilkes
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0077766/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

Jaws (1975)

JawsFor this year’s shark week special, we’ll start off with the biggest fish of them all, the ultimate shark horror movie. The one and only movie that scared people away from the beaches and even lakes and swimming pools (!). It scared the bejeezus out of a lot of people, and some even carries that galeophobia to this day. Yes, we’re of course talking about Jaws from 1975, an instant classic when it came and still remains one, directed by Steven Spielberg and based on the 1974 novel by Peter Benchley. While Psycho made people afraid of showers, Jaws made people afraid of the ocean.

 

The story starts off in the New England beach town of Amity Island, and we are presented with the first kill almost immediately. A group of young people are partying at the beach, and one of the girls decide to go for a late night swim, while her too intoxicated boyfriend drunkenly collapses and passes out in the sand before being able to join her. Lucky for him, as we soon see her pulled underwater and dragged around like a ragdoll. By what, we don’t see, but of course we have a hunch. Next morning, her partial remains are found washed up on the beach, and when the coroner concludes that this is caused by a shark attack, police chief Martin Brody wants to close the beaches for people’s safety. But, oh no…that won’t do, since the town’s summer economy would suffer! Mayor Larry Vaughn won’t have any of such nonsense, of course. So what happens next is that everything is swept under the rug, no shark here, false alarm, fake news, probably a boating accident. Then the young boy Alex Kintner is killed at a crowded beach, where everyone gets the pleasure or watching nature’s brutality at its finest. And now, of course, it’s time to take it seriously enough to put a bounty on the shark, causing a full-frenzied amateur shark hunting by the local fishermen. Soon afterwards, some of them catches a tiger shark, and the Mayor once again declares the beaches safe. Ding-Dong, the shark is dead! Or maybe not. Slicing it open, there are no human remains inside its stomach. It’s also not as big as the presumed culprit should be, which is more likely to be a great white shark of the much larger kind.

 

And yes, much of the plot’s key points have been copied, referenced, and parodized numerous times over the years: a giant killer shark (or other creature) plus a town not wanting to take it seriously because of tourist money and local traditions, or something similar. It’s a no-brainer that a movie’s huge success will always make people try to copy it, and there’s no doubt that Jaws has inspired numerous shark and creature feature movies, and continues to do so, because there’s just so much it got right. One of those things include Spielberg’s decision to use lesser known actors. He said that actors who were more anonymous would help the audience find it more believable, as stars bring a lot of memories along with them, and those memories can sometimes … corrupt the story. True words. Besides, we all know that the real star here is the shark anyway, so…

 

Jaws

 

Originally, this was actually not meant to be a Steven Spielberg film at all. John Sturges was first considered as director, then it went to Dick Richards instead, but he was dropped from the project. One of the reasons was apparently that he had a habit of describing the shark as a whale…I guess he mistook it for a Moby Dick story. Steven Spielberg became aware of the position and really, really wanted the job, and it all ended with the producers signing him to direct. The producers actually also wanted to train a great white shark for the movie. Uh…yeah, nope. Of course that was not possible, so that’s where Bruce came into the works, which were three full-size pneumantically powered prop sharks. And the film crew nicknamed the shark props after Spielberg’s lawyer Bruce Ramer. Fun spin on the old phrase “all lawyers are sharks”.

 

The movie was shot mostly on location at Martha’s Vineyard in Massachusetts. It was also the first major motion picture to be shot on the ocean, and yeah…the production was troubled where both the budget and schedules went to shit. To top it all, the main star of the movie, Bruce himself (the mechanical shark) malfunctioned all the time, causing Spielberg to focus more on the shark’s ominous presence than showing it very often. Which may very well have been art by accident, as this movie is definitely an excellent example of how less is more when it comes to showing off the monster. Add to it the excellent theme by John Williams, which has become so iconic you’ve probably heard it even if you haven’t seen the movie, and you’ve got the shark’s threatening presence in just a minimalist theme song. That’s no small feat. And despite being a movie that doesn’t show the monster all too often, it doesn’t drown in loads of unnecessary subplots or character interaction that doesn’t drive the story further (which can be an issue in some creature features). The pacing is really good, there’s a constant sinister vibe overlaying the movie due to the shark’s elusive presence. And of course, we have some kill scenes which are really well done.

 

I’ll admit, Jaws holds a special place in my heart as one of the very first movies to actually scare me. Like, literally. I saw it at a very young age, and as someone growing up in a coastal town where boat life and spending time nearby the ocean and fishing during the summer was a way of my normal everyday life, the idea of a giant shark prowling underneath the waves literally scared the piss out of me. Most of the other horror movies I’d seen was too fantastical and removed from reality to really give me any but what if impact. And while there aren’t even any great whites here in Norway, and the only shark species that roam the Norwegian waters are no threat to humans, it still instilled a deep-rooted fear in me which persisted. At the same time I also got fascinated by sharks, and I already had a love and fascination for ideas of sea monsters and the like, so overall I guess you can say that the movie kind of got me hooked.

 

If there is one downside with this movie, it’s how the public perception of sharks turned very negative, causing wide-spread trophy fishing and revenge hunts. I’d say that this is a people problem, not a movie problem though…both Peter Benchley and Steven Spielberg expressed regret over how the movie caused such an impact on the real-world shark population. That being said, shark populations have also suffered from industrial overfishing and the shark fin trade. Humans will always remain the most dangerous creature, no matter what.

 

Jaws was the highest grossing film in history until the release of Star Wars two years later, and in 2001 the Library of Congress selected it for preservation in the US National Film Registry. While there’s a huge ocean of shark movies out there, Jaws still takes the biggest and sharpest bite compared to all of them.

 

Jaws Jaws Jaws

 

Director: Steven Spielberg
Writers: Peter Benchley, Carl Gottlieb
Country & year: USA, 1975
Actors: Roy Scheider, Robert Shaw, Richard Dreyfuss, Lorraine Gary, Murray Hamilton, Carl Gottlieb, Jeffrey Kramer, Susan Backlinie, Jonathan Filley, Ted Grossman, Chris Rebello
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0073195/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

The Incredible Melting Man (1977)

The Incredible Melting Man… and no, we’re not talking about Simon Cowell. We follow the tragic odyssey of Steve, who’s on a space flight to Saturn (which I first assumed was the sun) where he gets exposed to some radiation of the Saturn rings. Next, we see him at a hospital bed, his face covered with bandages. His arms are like fried chickens, and we can only imagine what his face looks like. Well, it doesn’t look good. He sees himself in a mirror where he looks like a mix of an outcast from Tromaville and a zombie escaped from a Lucio Fulci filmset. He panics, kills two nurses and runs away in the Californian desert. I’d guess he had no health insurance.

 

Only two (yes 2) actors are credited in the opening sequence: Alex Rebar as The Incredible Melting Man, and Burr DeBenning as Dr. Ted Nelson. In other words; it’s really reassuring to know from the very start that there’s at least one surviving doctor in the house, ’cause Melty needs help ASAP. Instead, he now goes around and kills everyone he stumbles upon, and eats their skin in hope to slow the melting process. Sorry bud, but that only works in silly horror movies. Oh well. While Melty goes on his murder spree, Dr. Ted tracks him down by following his gooey footprints with a radiation detector. Good luck.

 

The Incredible Melting Man is the title, and that’s what you get. No clickbait BS. And the film is, for the most part, as self-aware as the title suggests — a throwback to the schlocky, cartoonish and campy monster films from the 1950s that are not to be taken seriously for a second. The producers, however, wanted more horror and less silliness, where some scenes were edited as a silent film, of all things, that were later removed. So much bullshit escalated behind the scenes that writer and director William Sachs almost replaced himself with Alan Smithee. The incoherency and tonal shift is all over the place where you have kids smoking cigarettes, and a scene with an elderly couple with goofy music that could be something from a sitcom. Then there’s the horny photographer with his blonde model in the middle of the desert, where I guess Roger Corman gave some input. Because it’s after all the 1970s where you gotta show some tits, even a little.

 

We see right away that the strongest part here is the make-up effects, done by Rick Baker, which later was the inspiration for a certain melting man in RoboCop (1987). Gallons of goop mixed with syrup and paint were used to make it look like Melty was constantly, well, melting.  The actor who plays Melty, Alex Rebar, hated the process and being in make-up, and turned out to be quite a primadonna. He even refused to wear several of the prosthetics, and said to Rick Baker once that I’m a big star in Italy, you know. Baker replied: I’ve never heard of you, and you’re playing The fucking Incredible Melting Man, so cut the crap! Haha, I bet that crushed his ego. This is no masterpiece, but a fun little dumb campy schlock filled with Z movie charm, some gory moments (most notably a floating head), and it surely lives up to its title.

 

The Incredible Melting Man The Incredible Melting Man The Incredible Melting Man

 

Writer and director: William Sachs
Also known as: Smeltende terror (Norway)
Country & year: USA, 1977
Actors: Alex Rebar, Burr DeBenning, Myron Healey, Michael Alldredge, Ann Sweeny, Lisle Wilson, Cheryl Smith, Julie Drazen, Stuart Edmond Rodgers, Chris Witney
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076191

 

Tom Ghoul

 

 

 

Hausu (1977)

HausuIn Tokyo, there lives a teenage girl whose name is Gorgeous. And yes, of course she is beautiful, and of course she’s also got a wealthy father and appears to be living a harmonious life with nothing to complain about. Her life turns upside down when her father, who has been widowed for a time, announces that he’s married a woman named Ryoko Ema. Who seems to be a very nice woman, by the way, ready to be the best stepmother she can. Gorgeous, on the other hand, throws a temper tantrum like a little, spoiled brat and hurries to her room, where she writes a letter to her aunt, whom she has never met, asking to come visit her. Gorgeous receives a letter back almost instantly. Of course lonely, old auntie is ready to welcome her! Gorgeous brings six of her friends along with her: Sweet, who is of course sweet as candy and with a personality as gentle as a lamb, Kung Fu whose specialty is martial arts (who would’ve guessed), Fantasy, who is constantly daydreaming and having her head in the clouds, Melody, who plays the piano like a maestro, Prof, who is an academic and intelligent girl, and Mac, who…loves to eat. And is of course fat (she isn’t, really, but that’s Asian beauty standards for you).

 

On the way to auntie’s house they bring along a white, fluffy cat, who appears to the aunt’s harbinger of sorts. Prior to getting to the aunt’s cozy country house, they meet a watermelon seller who could’ve more or less been the don’t go to the house kind of guy, but which does the opposite and tells them exactly how to get there. Greeting the girls in a wheelchair, the aunt seems to be very happy to welcome them. The always hungry Mac had of course bought a Watermelon from the seller they met earlier, and brings it as a gift which they leave in a well to keep it cold. And from now on, it doesn’t take long before everything inside the house turns into a spookfest of the purest insanity! It all starts with Mac going out to retrieve the watermelon, and doesn’t return. Worried, Fantasy goes to check on her, only to find Mac’s disembodied head which flies into the air and bites Fantasy in the butt. Nobody believes her, of course, but soon all kinds of supernatural shenanigans are happening all around the house, which is all so gaga loony that nothing can really prepare you for the enchantment of the House and its white fluffy kitty!

 

Hausu

 

House aka Hausu (Japanese: ハウス) is a Japanese comedy horror film from 1977, directed by Nobuhiko Obayashi.

 

Toho Studios contacted Obayashi because they wanted to make a movie like Jaws and needed ideas. Okey-dokey then. If Obayashi was an Italian he would probably gone ahead and urged Toho to make a shark film and call it Jaws 2, but we’re in Japan, where the craziest ideas are allowed to take form! So he went to his pre-teen daughter Chigumi for ideas, under the presumption that adults only think about things they understand, so everything stays on a boring human level while children can come up with the strangest things that defy explanation. Thus, sharks and beaches were replaced with a fluffy white cat and a spooky country house that eat girls. Obayashi also used some of his childhood as inspiration for some of the key elements in the movie. He was born in Hiroshima, and during the atomic bombings he lost all his childhood friends. He decided to use these themes into the plot of the film, by creating a plot element of a woman’s ghost waiting for her love to return back home from World War II, a wait that lasted forever since her lover died, and this turned her into an evil spirit. The ideas were given to Chiho Katsura, who then wrote the script for the film.

 

Now that the big cooking pot had boiled and simmered into this psychedelic brew, the project was green-lit. Except…it had to be put on hold for two years, because no one at Toho wanted to direct it as they all thought it would be a disaster that would ruin their career. Obayashi himself originally proposed to direct it, but he was turned down since he wasn’t amongst the staff at Toho. He kept promoting the film until the studio finally caved in and said alright then, since we can’t get anyone else to touch this thing with a 10-foot pole, go ahead and do your thing. And together with a bunch of amateur actors and a lot of pep, history was made.

 

If Toho Studios hoped for a critically acclaimed hit like Jaws, they were in for a nosedive on House. It mostly received negative reviews, but despite this, it ended up becoming a box office hit in Japan. Ironically, when the movie got a wider release in North America in 2009 and 2010, it was met with a much more favorable response and it was from here on that it gained a cult following.

 

Obayashi had, prior to this film, mostly worked in commercials and independent films, so the majority of the cast in House were not established actors. It was a mix of people he had worked with before, and some friends and family. His daughter even has a small role as the little girl in a shoemaker’s shop, and the shoemaker himself was played by the production designer. While being filmed in one of Toho’s largest sets, Obayashi made sure to have a playful attitude which caused everyone to have fun. The Toho crew felt the film was utter nonsense, but let’s be honest…it kind of is. But it’s the good kind of nonsense! The overall mix of complete nonsense, childish and upbeat tone with the horror elements reminiscent of the nightmare logic of a 5-year old, is what makes this movie such a unique experience, accompanied with a fitting score which was performed by a rock band called Godiego.

 

Visually, the movie leans towards a little kitsch and European fairytale vibe. There’s a lot of experimentation with practical effects, and insane imagery. There isn’t a single frame that looks uninspired or boring. The visuals fit so well together with all the spooky things happening all the time, as the girls are attacked by all kinds of things in the house: flaming logs, mattresses, and a finger-hungry piano…and something about a guy turning into a bunch of bananas. Because why not.

 

Nothing can really prepare you for the childish and golden insanity of House. Just sit back and enjoy the trip!

 

Hausu Hausu Hausu

 

Director: Nobuhiko Ôbayashi
Writers: Chiho Katsura, Nobuhiko Ôbayashi
Country & year: Japan, 1977
Actors: Kimiko Ikegami, Miki Jinbo, Kumiko Ôba, Ai Matsubara, Mieko Satô, Eriko Tanaka, Masayo Miyako, Kiyohiko Ozaki, Saho Sasazawa, a white fluffy persian cat
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076162/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

Dr Jekyll & Sister Hyde (1971)

Dr Jekyll & Sister HydeDr. Henry Jekyll is a man who has decided to dedicate his life to curing all illnesses, but he’s about to lose a bit of his determination after his a-hole friend, Professor Robertson, remarks that his experiments are taking such a long time that he will end up dead before he manages to achieve anything of importance. Ouch. Thanks for the encouragement, buddy. Jekyll lets this remark get to his head, and he starts to obsess over the thought of some kind of elixir of life. He ends up using female hormones which he takes from fresh cadavers supplied to him by the duo Burke and Hare (obviously not caring too much about how they got their hands on these corpses in the first place). He reasons that since women, at least traditionally, lives longer than men, this will help him prolong his own life.

 

Above his apartment, there lives a family consisting of an elderly mother, her son Howard and daughter Susan. And Susan is head over heels attracted to Jekyll, who returns her affections in somewhat awkward ways. Too bad he’s so obsessed with work that there’s no time for romance…he’s too busy making his life-extending serum, and once he’s ready to take a sip and test it, he finds that it’s got a peculiar side effect: it changes him into a woman. And he seems to become quite fond of his female alter ego, which he calls Mrs. Edwina Hyde and claims she is his sister. While Jekyll is getting more and more in touch with his feminine side (literally), Susan becomes jealous of the mysterious woman in Jekyll’s apartment (at least until learning that she’s his sister), and Howard starts lusting after her. And there’s a big problem for Jekyll: in order to keep making more of the serum, he needs a steady supply of female hormones…and when his suppliers Burke and Hare are lynched by a mob once people find out what they’ve been doing, Jekyll must take matters in his own hands…with the help of Sister Hyde, who is taking over both his body and mind gradually.

 

Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde is a British Hammer horror film from 1971, directed by Roy Ward Baker and based on the 1886 novella Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson. It’s notable for having a female version of Hyde, and also for implementing several historical incidents like Jack the Ripper and the Burke and Hare cases. There have been numerous adaptions of the well-known novella, including the 1931 film Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. And while both the original novella and many of its adaptation are often allegories for alcoholism/drug dependency, this is the only one I’ve seen thus far that gives it a gender-bending theme.

 

Through modern eyes I guess it’s easy to see it as an allegory for being trans. In the first transformation scene, where Jekyll (Ralph Bates) transforms into Hyde (Martine Beswick), the reaction is one of near euphoria where the initial moment of surprise quickly transcends into one of pure joy and relief, where she touches herself and examines her new body. The Hyde persona easily becomes the most dominant, where they both try to fight for control. Just like in the original story, where Dr. Jekyll could have just stopped taking the serum and be rid of Hyde, he becomes dependent on it and just can’t stop. Martine Beswick, who earlier played a role in two James Bond movies (From Russia With Love from 1963 and Thunderball from 1965) first laughed at the premise of the film when being offered the role, but after thinking it over a bit she found the idea of a male/female inside the same person as an interesting theme to explore.

 

Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde is a stylish Hammer horror film, where the scenery and sets create a convincing Victorian London era, with a misty, gloomy and gothic atmosphere. Totally Hammer-style, for sure, with it’s blood and boobs formula which where their forte at the time.

 

In 1995, a remake of the film was released under the title Dr. Jekyll and Ms. Hyde, which received a Razzie Award for Worst Remake/Rip-Off. And the trailer for that one pretty much speaks for itself.

 

Dr Jekyll & Sister Hyde Dr Jekyll & Sister Hyde Dr Jekyll & Sister Hyde

 

Director: Roy Ward Baker
Writer: Brian Clemens
Country & year: UK, 1971
Actors: Ralph Bates, Martine Beswick, Gerald Sim, Lewis Fiander, Dorothy Alison, Neil Wilson, Ivor Dean, Paul Whitsun-Jones, Philip Madoc, Tony Calvin
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0068502/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

The Antichrist (1974)

The AntichristIppolita is a young woman who has been paraplegic since a car accident when she was 12. The accident killed her mother, and left her broken in more ways than one. The doctors have diagnosed her paralysis as purely psychosomatic due to mental trauma rather than any physical issues. She’s also gotten very reliant on her father, the wealthy Rome aristocrat Massimo, and more or less craving his attention nonstop. Her attachment issues skyrockets when she finds out that Massimo has gotten romantically involved with a woman named Greta.

 

Ippolita, wanting more of her own life and especially to get rid of her paralysis, eventually reaches out to her uncle who is a Vatican cardinal. He only recommends her to get in contact with a parapsychologist named Marcello Sinibaldi, who uses hypnosis on her because he believes that she’s having unconscious memories of her past lives. One of these past lives is none other than a witch (well, of course!) who entered a covenant with Satan and was burned at the stake. Ippolita is possessed by her ancestor’s spirit, and even regains her ability to walk, which she does only under a dissociated state. During this state she ends up killing a tourist after seducing him in her own witchy way. Then things only escalate, where Ippolita becomes fully possessed and lets everyone know that she’s learned a few bad words like cock and whore. Especially cock, which seems to be her new favorite word. Ippolita is now ready to let her witchy, demonic side out in full. Mamma Mia! Time to call the exorcist!

 

The Antichrist (original title: L´anticristo), also being released under the title The Tempter, is a supernatural horror film from 1974, directed by Alberto De Martino and co-written with Gianfranco Clerici and Vincenzo Mannino. Yet another cash-in on the success of The Exorcist (1973), but despite all the cheese and nonsense in this film I don’t think anyone can beat The Turkish Exorcist, Seytan. Its place as number-one in the most baffling and hilarious exorcist ripoffs remains unsurpassed.

 

While this film is another blatant The Exorcist ripoff, it is on a completely other level than the aforementioned Seytan. The Antichrist actually harbors some qualities, especially in the visual department. Joe D’Amato worked as director of photography on this film, under his real name Aristide Massaccessi. This easily explains why the movie feels fairly competent visually, and combined with a score composed by Ennio Morricone and Bruno Nicolai, there are actually some scenes which manage to deliver some decent atmosphere. It doesn’t take long until it stumbles between each of those, however, as the pacing is quite off at times and the special effects are mostly goofy. Ippolita’s character isn’t exactly the most sympathetic to begin with, but her change into a murderous, horny, foul-mouthed witch becomes more ludicrous than shocking. Hearing an adult woman say cock will never pack the same punch as hearing a 12-year old say your mother sucks cocks in hell.

 

There are some scenes that goes straight into wtf-land with some surreal fantasy-dream-nightmare visuals, and of course we get a rather lengthy Satanic orgy in Satan’s garden in Hell (or wherever it’s supposed to be). With all that talk of cock it was about time she finally got some. Despite some good things, the film is struggling with the pacing issues and some rather laughable scenes which are actually supposed to be scary. Or at least I think so. We have a disembodied flying hand that chokes a guy, a hilarious levitation scene, and so many other things which I suppose are supposed to be horror elements, but just makes you chuckle instead. It’s a totally confused mixture of witchcraft, satanism, possession, sleaze, and goofy effects. But is it still entertaining? Hell, yes!

 

Overall, The Antichrist is a movie that can be a fun watch if you want to see a sleaze ‘n cheese ripoff of The Exorcist. If you’re in for a challenge: take it as a double-feature with The Turkish Exorcist, Seytan!

 

Fun Fact: Carla Gravina, who plays the role as Ippolita, revealed that she had some trouble playing the role and would never accept anything similar ever again. After starting the shooting of the film, she said she started to feel some kind of strange disease coming on, which she described as differing between an intense cold, feeling dizzy, getting a feeling of emptiness, headaches, lack of appetite, and so on. Doctors diagnosed that it was most likely due to overwork and curious psychic influences

 

The Antichrist The Antichrist The Antichrist

 

Director: Alberto De Martino
Writers: Gianfranco Clerici, Alberto De Martino, Vincenzo Mannino
Original title: L’anticristo
Also known as: The Tempter
Country & year: Italy, 1974
Actors: Carla Gravina, Mel Ferrer, Arthur Kennedy, George Coulouris, Alida Valli, Mario Scaccia, Umberto Orsini, Anita Strindberg, Remo Girone, Ernesto Colli
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0071150/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

Phantasm (1979)

PhantasmI had a compunction to try to do something in the horror genre and I started thinking about how our culture handles death; it’s different than in other societies. We have this central figure of a mortician. He dresses in dark clothing, he lurks behind doors, they do procedures on the bodies we don’t know about. The whole embalming thing, if you ever do any research on it, is pretty freaky. It all culminates in this grand funerary service production. It’s strange stuff. It just seemed like it would be a great area in which to make a film. ― Don Coscarelli

 

And speaking of strange stuff; something really, really strange is going on at the local Morningside Cemetery in a sleepy Oregon suburb. The 13-year-old boy, Mike (A. Michael Baldwin) can tell about a mysterious, elderly, tall, Ebenezer Scrooge’ish mortician, simply called The Tall Man (Angus Scrimm), who steals coffins, puts them in his hearse with his bare hands (!), and drives away. WTF. And yes, there’s a lot of WTF’s here, the whole franchise is a big fat WTF. After spying on him with binoculars, Mike hops on his scooter and follows him to a mansion. And if the place looks familiar, it’s the legendary Dunsmuir House. But that’s only the nice facade of something much more, well, sinister.

 

His big brother Jody (Bill Thornbury) doesn’t believe what Mike’s saying. That’s until Mike manages to cut of a finger of The Tall Man after his hand gets trapped between a door. Yellow blood spurts. Mike puts the finger in a small box, and as he opens it to show his brother, the finger is alive and crawls like a larva. Oki doki, I believe you! So… where do we go from here? Calling the cops? Yeah, right. The finger turns into a cheap-looking fly with toothpicks as teeth that ends up being shoved down the garbage disposal.

 

Anyway, Jody is now more than convinced and so is his bandmate and the local ice cream man, Reggie (Reggie Bannister), who makes it really clear as he’s saying while pointing his index finger in the air:

Okay. I see it, I see it all now. What we gotta do is we gotta snag that tall dude and stomp the shit out of him, and we’ll find out what the hell is going on up there. Yeah! We lay that sucker out flat and drive a stake right through his goddamn heart!

If it was just that simple, ’cause that mother’s strong, Mike says. Well, he’ll eventually realize that you should never underestimate a bald ice cream vendor guy with a ponytail. Shantae would agree with that.

 

And then we, of course, have the iconic crystal balls/spheres, an element that follows and gets some cool upgrades throughout the films. They’re the sentinel drones of The Tall Man, which simply flies straight to the victims and trespassers’ foreheads, drills into their skull and sucks all the blood from their brain. Gnarly. The head of Larry Fessenden would give a sphere a whole field day.

 

So, what exactly is a Phantasm? It’s The delusion of a distorted mind. A phantom. A spirit. A ghost. It’s what you yourself make it out to be. It can be all from grandpa Seth, Bigfoot, to the haunted skeletons in your closet. In other words, the franchise never gives us a clear answer or a satisfying conclusion, not even close. Only leaving more questions, just like a fever dream would. I had this weird dream last night, ya know.

 

Don Coscarelli (also known for the alternative Elvis Presley’s coming-of-old-age biopic Bubba Ho-Tep) was only 23 years old when he wrote, directed, produced and edited his passion project Phantasm over the course of one year during chaotic weekends. The calling to make a horror movie came as a lightbolt over Coscarelli’s head when people jumped in their seats over a scene in his previous Halloween-themed comedy-drama film, Kenny & Company (1976). Scaring people is fun, eh? OoOoh yeah! The original plan was to make an adaptation of Ray Bradbury’s Something Wicked This Way Comes, but the license had already been sold to Disney.

 

The original cut for Phantasm was three hours, and Coscarelli had zero plans for a sequel, nor to make another horror film. Which makes me assume that there would perhaps be a better conclusion somewhere in that runtime, lost in the editing, than the more cryptic puzzles we got in the sequels. Who knows.

 

The budget and its very limited resources are sometimes clearly visible at some points, especially the scene with the fly, which gives a prime example that not everything looks better in 4K. The film’s strengths are the rock-solid cinematography (also done by Coscarelli) and has a unique dark melancholic atmosphere where you almost get the sense that The Tall Man has sucked all the light from the surroundings. Everything feels dead and quiet and just off, as if the few characters we see here is trapped in some obscure purgatory, frozen in time. What’s real, what’s not. Is it all just a dream, or is it just the wind? And what in hell is that unearthly humming sound? Could it actually be the sound of hell itself? The theme track by Fred Myrow really stands out, which could be described as a more somber remix of John Carpenter’s Halloween.

 

The child actor at the time, A. Michael Baldwin does a good job here, as he, more or less, carries the whole film on his shoulders. The brother-dynamic between Mike and Jody is wholesome enough as they eventually team up to blast The Tall Man where he came from, wherever that is. Reggie also chimes in, who we get to see a lot more of in the sequels.

 

And that’s Phantasm for you – cryptic slowburn with eerie dreamlike surrealism, sprinkled with eccentric sci-fi elements and a handful of WTFs. Good night and don’t let The Tall Man bite.

 

Phantasm Phantasm Phantasm

 

 

Writer and director: Don Coscarelli
Country & year: USA, 1979
Actors: A. Michael Baldwin, Bill Thornbury, Reggie Bannister, Angus Scrimm, Kathy Lester, Terrie Kalbus, Kenneth V. Jones, Susan Harper, Lynn Eastman-Rossi, David Arntzen
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079714/

 

Sequels:
– Phantasm II (1988)
– Phantasm III (1994)

 

Tom Ghoul

 

 

 

 

The Island of the Fishmen (1979)

The Island of the FishmenA married couple are being brought to an island, to explore a cave where there’s supposedly a treasure. Well, after some gory kill scenes (which is pretty much the only real gory scenes to be witnessed here) we realize that this opening was only set up so we could have some kill counts. Okey then, over to our main characters. We’re still in the latter part of the 1800’s, 1891 to be exact, where we’re introduced to some shipwrecked characters. A military doctor, Lieutenant Claude de Ross, and a group of convicts. After getting attacked by the mysterious fishmen we glimpsed in the opening scene, the remaining survivors washes ashore on what appears to be an uncharted Caribbean island. There, some more of them meet their unfortunate ends, and after fleeing through the jungle, Claude and the two last survivors meet a beautiful young woman named Amanda who warns them to leave the island. Uhh…yeah, I think they would if they could, lady. Soon they meet the villainous Edmond Rackham, who is obviously keeping secrets and knows everything about the alleged Fishmen. So does Amanda, apparently, when Claude spies on her one night where she goes into the water and feeds the fishmen some kind of strange milk-like liquid. While Edmond keeps acting more and more like a discarded James Bond villain, Claude eventually finds out the secrets of the Fishmen and the island.

 

The Island of the Fishmen is a horror film from 1979, directed by Sergio Martino. In 1981, approx. 30 minutes of footage from the original film was removed and replaced with new material for an international release by Roger Corman and his New World Pictures company, and this version of the movie was given the title Screamers. The original barely had any blood in it, while the Corman release decided to re-shoot new scenes which included the opening with the kill counts, to add some gore. They did a Shelby Oaks, in other words. Unfortunately, they didn’t just add some gore in Screamers: they also advertised the movie as something it definitely was not, providing a poster with graphics and taglines that promised a completely different film. They’re men turned inside out! And worse…they’re still alive! plus Be warned: you will actually see a man turned inside out. Nope, that’s pure BS, and totally misleading. But that’s enough of the film’s troubled and fucked up production and release, let’s talk a little more about the film itself:

 

The version we have seen is the Screamers one, and it’s obvious from early on that the movie appears to be struggling with some kind of identity crisis: the opening scene which was shot for the American release pretty much promises a goofy gorefest. It’s not. Then we have the crazy scientist meaning well but inevitably creating something horrible, a damsel in distress, a sunken city, an over-the-top villain, and of course a golden treasure to be found. In this boiling voodoo pot there’s so many ingredients that it almost feels a little disorienting. What offers the most entertainment value here is, of course, the fishmen in their goofy B-grade costumes, with their entry often accompanied by what sounds like an elephant trumpeting…and no, they do not have trunks. The locations and settings are nice enough, with the jungle, dilapidated old house and underwater scenery. The characters are mostly quite bland, though, with the exception of Edmond Rackham. Whenever that guy’s on screen it’s filled with his villainry and cheesy smirk-talking.

 

Overall The island of the Fishmen aka Screamers is kind of ridiculous, but not to such a point that it becomes hilarious. A little slow at times, especially after seeing the crazy opening scene which, although fun, didn’t tie well in with the rest of the movie. It’s still got a certain B-grade charm to it, with an adventurous flair. A fine summer watch if you want an adventure-based movie with Humanoids from the Deep-like monsters, where Roger Corman got involved and the fishmen still didn’t become a bigger threat to the women than the men (I can imagine he really wanted to make some changes there, though…)

 

In 1995, Sergio Martino directed a made-for-Italian TV sequel, which was called The Fishmen and Their Queen, aka Queen of the Fishmen.

 

The Island of the Fishmen The Island of the Fishmen

 

Director: Sergio Martino
Writers: Cesare Frugoni, Luciano Martino, Sergio Donati
Original title: L’isola degli uomini pesce
Also known as: Screamers
Country & year: Italy, 1979
Actors: Barbara Bach, Claudio Cassinelli, Richard Johnson, Beryl Cunningham, Joseph Cotten, Franco Javarone, Roberto Posse, Giuseppe Castellano, Franco Mazzieri
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081467/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

I Drink Your Blood (1971)

I Drink Your BloodThis grimy, low-budget Grindhouse classic wastes no time as we are thrown straight into an obscure Satanic cult ritual in the woods in the middle of the night, led by the charismatic sociopath Horace Born. He is a self-proclaimed Capricorn who was born in Hell and reborn on Mother Earth to do Satan’s work with his group of hippie Satanists called The Sons and Daughters of Satan. Sounds wholesome. They drink blood spiced with LSD as they’re buck naked before sacrificing a poor chicken (for real). A trigger warning for animal cruelty. The whole act is spied on by Sylvia, who is the girlfriend of one of Horace’s cult members. And Horace won’t have any of that. After a quick chasing scene with some funk music, she is caught, where we can only assume that she is gang-raped off-screen, before she barely makes it home alive. Next day Horace and company’s hippie truck won’t start and have to walk to the nearest town, which is Valley Hills, a small hillbilly town in the bumfuck of nowhere.

 

They buy a box of meat pies at the local bakery before they seek shelter in an abandoned hotel – where they completely trash the place and wreck havoc while they chase a bunch of scared rats to barbecue and eat for dinner. Yum, Burp and Hail Satan. These were trained rats, by the way, which were also used in Willard, another horror film from the same year. The dead rats we see in the barbecue scene were already dead prior to the film, if we’re gonna trust the trivia section on IMDb. Anyway, when Sylvia’s grandfather learns that this Satanic cult is in town, he decides to pay them a visit to confront them with a shotgun. But because he’s a slow, old fool, he fails miserably and gets beaten before they pour some LSD into his mouth. Even though they’re kind enough to spare his life, his grandson and Sylvia’s younger brother, Pete, who’s also been spying on them, is the next to spit on their grave. He takes the shotgun to finish his granddads’ revenge, but on his way he shoots and kills a rabid dog. And one can say that things gets really interesting from here on.

 

Because listen to this: Pete, the smartass, takes a sample of the dog’s rabies-infected blood, mixes it with the meat pies that Horace and co eventually eat and… well, it doesn’t go exactly as imagined. Instead of dying instantly, they slowly turn into deranged zombie-like foaming flesh-eaters, who end up attacking the townsfolk and turn Valley Hills into an apocalyptic rabies warzone which can be described as Night of the Living Dead meets The Crazies. Only, this one is far more out there than these two combined, sprinkled with more LSD, schlock and unhinged, unapologetic B-movie madness. We can say the intention of Pete was good, but man, talk about shitting the bed. Heads are rolling, limbs chopped apart, and one dude has his teeth falling out as he gets piggybacked stronghold, and some other bizarre WTF moments. It’s a full-on riot with lots of sadistic, goofy fun. Plain and simple, and not much deeper than that. I Drink Your Blood was also the first film to have the historic achievement to be stamped with an X-rating. Hats off.

 

I Drink Your Blood is available on Blu-ray from Grindhouse Releasing, and was once upon a time on Tubi. Don’t bother looking for it on YouTube as it’s filled with pixelization censoring.

 

I Drink Your Blood I Drink Your Blood

 

Writer and director: David E. Durston
Country & year: USA, 1971
Actors: Bhaskar Roy Chowdhury, Jadin Wong, Rhonda Fultz, George Patterson, Riley Mills, John Damon, Elizabeth Marner-Brooks, Richard Bowler, Tyde Kierney, Iris Brooks
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0067229/

 

Tom Ghoul