Dad Bill (George Kennedy) and daughter Julie are having a wholesome time in a forest summer house playing board games. Suddenly, they hear some growling outside the front door before a hideous-looking Bigfoot creature storms in and kills Julie. The monster drags her body outside, only with some few lousy scratch marks on her face, while Bill lies knocked out on the floor.
Then we get introduced to our group of teens, played by actors in their mid-twenties, who’s about to spend some summer party time in the house we saw earlier. Bill suddenly shows up with a rifle to warn those damn kids that this place is dangerous! They, of course, don’t believe him, because why should they. But Bill is no bullshitter and sets the record straight as he says:
― There’s a thousand stories about this place… ghosts, and UFO’s, and monsters, and Bigfoot, you name it! They’re all bullshit. I know what’s real. What’s real is what happened to me and Julie, and nobody’s going to tell me any different. Now, if you’ve got any brains between the two of you, you’ll get in that truck and get the hell out of here right now. This place is dangerous!
Oki-doki-mister. Anyway… the first night sets in, we have a cheesy soft-core sex scene, one of the girls is taking a shower, and surprise, surprise: Bigfoot comes in, wreaks some havoc, and kills one of them before he leaves. Next morning the rest of the group head out to the woods to find the main road. Good luck and don’t take any pissing breaks. As schlocky as the film is, I have to give some props to the monster design, made by John Carl Buechler, that is moons apart from the Mick Jagger Bigfoot from Night of the Demon (1980).
But then we also have some side-plots with two young women, Betsy and Tara, who eventually get topless, and a… birdwatcher, only to have some more bodycounts. Fun trivia: One of the topless women, Tara, is Georges Kennedy’s daughter, Shannon Kennedy, who was cast because he wouldn’t be in the film unless his daughter got a small role, and this is the only role she ever played. Better than nothing, as we say. And then zombies, of all things, start to show up. Just what you expected, right? So, where does this thing actually go, you may ask? Oh, it certainly goes somewhere, that I can say for sure, haha…
Look, here’s the thing: the best way to watch Demonwarp is to know little to nothing beforehand. Because as the film progressed, we went into the film’s page on IMDb, scrolled through some of the screenshots, just to be sure if we actually saw the right movie. And, well, haha, we did. The majority of the film is a standard, micro budget almost Z-level monster schlock where the Bigfoot monster is chasing boobs in the local woods, whereas the last thirty minutes is where I’d guess that a drunk and delirious Lucio Fulci came to the set and finished the film. Crazy, retarded fun stuff to watch with pizza and Jack Daniel’s.
Director: Emmett Alston
Writers: John Carl Buechler, Jim Bertges, Bruce Akiyama
Country & year: USA, 1988
Actors: George Kennedy, David Michael O’Neill, Pamela Gilbert, Billy Jayne, Hank Stratton, Colleen McDermott, Michelle Bauer, Shannon Kennedy Sullivan, John Durbin, Jill Marin
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0094998/
