Bloodlust: Subspecies III starts right off where the previous one ended. And now it gets real serious when Radu has taken all control over his dear bride, Michelle. The Stockholm Syndrome (or the Transylvanian Syndrome, if you will) has started to slightly hit while she does her best to maintain the last few fibers she has left of humanity. Michelle’s sister, Becky, is still in Romania trying to save her with the help of Mel.
The options start to run out as Radu has joined forces with his mother, still simply called Mummy, and they are actually such a badass duo who can cast their shadow way up to the moon. And no, don’t worry, he won’t do a Bowser and force-marry her up there. With Michelle, they have now isolated themselves behind the tall brick walls of their castle, here with the ext. and int. of the beautiful Corvin Castle. And good luck trying to get in without Simon’s whip.
So, what now? Yeah, great question. Now that the police can’t do shit and the options are down to zero, let’s … uhm … call The Expendables.
And that’s actually not a joke.
And since Sly Stallone wasn’t available, we have Michael Della Femina as none other than the CIA solder Bob. I’m not sure if Bob is meant to be a sort of a comic relief here, but (—MILD SPOILERS AHEAD—) there’s something hilarious about a buff military dude getting whacked down by an old, dusty granny mummy, just like that. Too bad he protected himself with silver bullets instead of garlic bullets. RIP Bob.
As Michelle’s lust and need for human blood starts to kick in, Radu has to take her down to the dark alleys of Bucharest to teach her how to hunt for victims. It’s either that or to suffer like a withdrawing heroin addict and die. And Lieutenant Marin is still here, trying to do his job with chasing vampires while trying not to disappoint his “big boss“. We also have some drama and a tension that boils between Radu and his mum, which also makes this a perfect film to watch on Mother’s Day. The big payoff here is maybe the most epic vampire death captured on celluloid.
There isn’t a lot more to say about this one, other than it feels more like an extended version of a missing third act of the previous film. These two were, after all, made back-to-back with much of the same production values, where we have great use of ancient Romanian locations, and overall soaked in thick, delicious gothic atmosphere. Yum! An overall solid entry that wraps it up as a nice little trilogy … until we got a fourth film five years later.
Writer and director: Ted Nicolaou Country & year: Romania/USA, 1994 Actors: Anders Hove, Denice Duff, Kevin Spirtas, Melanie Shatner, Michael Denish, Pamela Gordon, Ion Haiduc, Michael Della Femina IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109302/
Bloodstone: Subspecies II starts right where the first one left off. We’re in Castle Vladislas where Michelle (portrayed by Denise Duff from here on) is a freshly-bitten vampire, lying in a coffin while her friends are killed by Radu. And speaking of Radu, who’s gotten his head chopped off… according to the vampire encyclopedia, it isn’t enough to just cut off their head, you know. Because you also have to burn the head on a stake to completely finish them. If not, the head will somehow magically attach itself back, like what happens here.
After Radu’s epic little awakening, he finishes his brother Stefan by shoving a stake through his chest, drinking his blood that jets like a fountain. Shows you just how wicked Radu really is. First his father, now his brother. Oh, my. Radu opens the coffin of a scared Michelle, and is about to finish her off as well. A little too late as the sun rises just in time to make Radu rush himself down to his crypt in the basement. There’s a lot to process in these first ten minutes, but after the sun has gone down again, Radu is too late —again— as Michelle has escaped the castle.
To make matters worse for Radu, she has taken the ancient relic, the Bloodstone, with her that was in the coffin with Stefan. Radu gets furious as he trashes the corpse of his brother like an unhinged drug-addict (like he metaphorically is) before he gets on Michelle’s tail, who’s jumped on a train to Bucharest. Michelle checks into a hotel and phones her sister Becky (Melanie Shatner) in the USA. Before Becky is able to get on the first plane to Romania, Michelle dies in the bathtub in her room, and… that’s it, I guess?
Lieutenant Marin (Ion Haiduc) spots two bitemarks on her neck, and like most level-headed Romanian people, the last thing on his mind is vampirism. He gets hold of the Bloodstone, which he assumes is a stolen antique. Well, not far from the truth. Anyway, on the way to the morgue, Michelle suddenly wakes up in the bodybag, scares the daylight out of the coroners, before she runs to seek shelter from the sun. In other words, her sister, Becky, will have a hard time tracking down Michelle in Bucharest. What a mess.
Meanwhile, Radu pays his mother a visit, simply called Mummy (Pamela Gordon). She’s a ghoulish witch skeleton who lives in a cemetery tomb, of course. And she’s not related to the Crypt Keeper, just to clarify. She’s also as evil as she looks and does what she can with her magic to help her beloved son to claim back the Bloodstone and catch Michelle, who he now has some other plans for. Becky gets help from the US Embassy Agent Mel (Kevin Spirtas) to find her sister.
While the first film was mostly filmed in the Romanian countryside, here we expand the horizon in the big city of Bucharest. And I wouldn’t be too surprised if this was also the first American film to be shot in the capital. However, this is peak Full Moon. The first three Subspecies films as a whole are the best thing they’ve ever created (alongside with the first three Puppet Masters), where the second is the grand jewel of the series.
There are some more interesting characters here as well. Denise Duff, who took over the role as Michelle, does an outstanding job here as she slowly loses her identity and has to adjust to the dark, addicted life as a bloodsucking vampire. Melanie Shatner (yes, the daughter of William Shatner) does a solid job as the concerned sister as well. Kevin Spirtas as Mel comes off as more flat and dry, while we have some subtle comic relief moments with Lieutenant Marin, who doesn’t buy any of this vampire-fairy tale boolshit. We also have the old historian Nicolai Popescu (Michael Denish), a charming little oddball. Radu’s Mummy, adds some more of the cheese factor as she looks like something from a 80s fantasy horror movie.
Everything here is of high quality, all from the cinematography, the story, pacing, the effects/make-up, the music to the acting. Everything just clicks. The advantage of the old city of Bucharest really enhances the mood and the stylish gothic atmosphere all up to eleven while Radu casts his dark shadow over the city buildings. The use of light and shadows and the contrast-filled visuals are alone a delight to watch. It looks menacing and beautiful at the same time, and if you weren’t tempted to visit Romania after the first film, this one surely will.
Writer and director: Ted Nicolaou Country & year: Romania/USA, 1993 Actors: Anders Hove, Denice Duff, Kevin Spirtas, Melanie Shatner, Michael Denish, Pamela Gordon, Ion Haiduc, Norman Cabrera, Wayne Toth IMDb:https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106436/
Hey, now that the evil dictator Nicolae Ceaușescu has finally been shot and executed on national TV, and Romania has been freed from the communist party, maybe we should pay the country a visit? Charles Band with his brand-new film company, Full Moon Features, certainly didn’t hesitate. Because after disbanding his decade-long Empire Pictures, he needed something quite special to add to his new company. Full Moon had already produced the first three Puppet Master films with great success, but here comes the coolest piece of trivia in the history of cinema: Subspecies was not only the first American film to be shot in Romania, it was also the first vampire flick to be filmed in that country after the fall of communism. Talk about a double win!
Charles Band quickly scrapped together the title and the classic poster we see on the right before thinking about the script. Director Ted Nicolaou (who also directed the four sequels, plus the spin-off Vampire Journals) asked what the hell the small creatures that carry the woman on the poster was supposed to be. How could he know, it was something that was cool to have on the poster, so the writers just had to come up with something. They ended up being the ones we actually call the Subspecies, and Radu’s (the film’s antagonist) minions, which are just a tiny minor element to the films. They only appear briefly as a quick afterthought in the first two and in the second and the third one.
This epic saga starts with a silhouette shot of the famous Bran Castle where the king Vladislas (Angus Scrimm) in a big fluffy wig, probably borrowed fromthis guy, is having a drop from an ancient relic called the Bloodstone, the films precious MacGuffin. This stone produces saints’ blood as quickly as a porn stars’ ballsack, so the vampires can live in their own darkness without hunting down humans. And in comes Radu, one of the sons of Vladislas. He’s pure evil, inside and out, with long fingers that would make Count Orlok jealous. He wants the Bloodstone for some reason, even though he hunts down humans just for the hell of it. He wants the whole pie for sure, and the Bloodstone is just the cherry on top. He kills the king with a dagger, claims the castle, and Romania is no longer safe. So much for the execution of Ceaușescu. La dracu!
Then we meet a group of three young female students who travel to Transylvania to study Romanian culture and folklore. Our main girl is Michelle from the US (Laura Tate) who’ll be the main protagonist in the first four films. After meeting at the train station, they drive to a village in the countryside where we get a unique glimpse of an obscure, broken and piss-poor country where the dust after decades of dictatorship hasn’t even begun to settle. It’s grim and moody with all real sets and locations, which gives the film a more raw, organic vibe. The special effects are a whole other aspect, though, which I’ll come back to.
After settling in at an old hotel in the town of Prejmer, they meet the young man, Stefan. He and Michelle fall quickly in love. But there’s only one problem: Stefan is actually a vampire, you see, and the brother of Radu. And Stefan is the polar opposite of Radu, as he’s a good-hearted handsome chad who tries his best to live a normal, civilized life with mortals, thanks to the Bloodstone. Those days seem to be over, though, especially when Radu gets those precious young female students on his radar and starts to hunt them down. Rasnov Fortess was used as Radu’s hiding place, just to mention.
Full Moon made a malicious villain here with Radu, who’s best described as a more monstrous-looking Eric Draven. He’s played by the more unknown Danish actor Anders Hove, who also repriced his role in the four sequels. He brings back much of the primitive and animistic mannerism we saw with Nosferatu while he adds his own distinctiveness to it. The new aspect of Radu is that he talks with a raspy voice like someone with stage 4 throat cancer. And he never seems able to wipe his mouth after biting someone’s neck as he drools like a baby where even the hardcore goth girls would cringe and say “ew“.
The music/soundtrack here is really remarkable, constructed by four composers and performed by the Aman Folk Orchestra. It’s dark and moody, filled with classical tunes that go hand in hand with the obscure and eerie Romanian surroundings. The theme for the opening credits, enhanced in the next two sequels, became such a classic that the black metal band Marduk made a cover version dedicated to Radu, called Nightwing.
While we have a compelling vampire villain, the biggest credit goes to the use of locations, as already mentioned. We have forest landscapes, castle ruins, villages, old ancient buildings in general, and considering the harsh circumstances, the film looks way better than it probably should. Because there are some clearly rough edges here on the technical levels, especially the scenes with Radu’s minion creatures. They originally used actors in costumes with large sets which ended up as deleted scenes. The problem was, according to the director himself (from a journal he wrote during the production), was that they were played by drunk Romanians who I’d guess were still in celebratory mode after the death of Ceaușescu. And then there were the language barriers. So instead, we have some charming creatures made of claymation in stop-motion made by David Allen, who also worked on the Puppet Master films. The only thing missing is their shadow where the moldy B movie cheese really reeks, and it’s a positive thing that they have very little screen time. They look much better in the next two films though.
So, despite its bumps in the road, Subspecies is a solid and a very ambitious start to a nice, little trilogy that expands on its own twist on Eastern European vampire lore. I’m not sure how much impact this will have on today’s generation as this is a product from its time – but Radu, the locations, the overall atmosphere and the music alone make it worth a watch. The two sequels are great as well, especially the second. You can watch them all on fullmoonfeatures.com.
Director: Ted Nicolaou Writers: Charles Band, Jack Canson, David Pabian Country & year: Romania/USA, 1991 Actors: Anders Hove, Irina Movila, Laura Mae Tate, Michelle McBride, Ivan J. Rado, Mara Grigore, Adrian Vâlcu, Michael Watson, Angus Scrimm IMDb:https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103002/
Elisabeth Sparkle is an award-winning actress who hosts a popular aerobics show for TV. It’s been going great for a long time, she’s even gotten her own Hollywood Walk of Fame star! There is one problem, though…she isn’t getting younger. No one ever gets younger, of course, but for someone like Elisabeth Sparkle, who’s got her whole life tied around her looks and beauty, this natural process hits much harder. After shooting her aerobics show like always, on the day that is her fiftieth birthday, she needs to go to the restroom. She finds that the women’s restroom is closed off, so she decides to go into the men’s room instead. While inside one of the stalls, the producer enters talking loudly on the phone. The conversation is about her, of course, and in no kind terms he describes how they need to get rid of her and replace her with someone young and hot. Ouch. After he leaves, Elisabeth comes slowly out of the stall, looking at herself in the mirror and realizing that everything in her life has been turned upside down.
After being fired, she notices that her billboard is taken down which causes her to get involved in a car accident. She leaves the incident with only minor injuries, but in the hospital one of the young male nurses gives her a flash drive together with a note saying “it changed my life“. At home she plays the flash drive, which promotes a serum called “The Substance“, which will create another version of yourself: one that is younger and more “perfect“. This new version will still be connected to you and you will be as as one. Elisabeth, after some hesitation, decides to make her order. And thus, her new young and perfect version is born through a slit in her back, and she adopts the name Sue. In order to make this all work perfectly as per the instructions, they must switch after 7 days: one week with Sue, one week with Elisabeth. Everything seems to go perfect: Sue gets hired as the new host for the aerobics TV show, and is steadily rising towards more and more fame. But things soon turn out to not work so great after all…
The Substance is a satirical science fiction horror movie from 2024, with many body horror elements and a lot of dark comedy. The film is co-produced, written and directed by Coralie Fargeat, and stars Demi Moore, Margaret Qualley and Dennis Quaid. The film was shot in France, in a studio in the Paris region and on location on the Côte d’Azur. Demi Moore was originally very nervous about filming full nudity scenes at the age of 61, and felt vulnerable (which, I guess, just goes to show the effect age has on us and our self esteem, just like portrayed in the film). Her 29 year old co-star Margaret Qualley, who plays the role as her younger version, also performed totally naked and Demi Moore credits her for making her feel more comfortable on the set, stating that she “was a great partner who I felt very safe with“.
Upon viewing this film we didn’t really know what to expect. And oh boy, were we in for a ride! Taking the concept of how society and the entertainment business treats aging, especially towards women, Fargeat has spun an intricate and twisted tale filled with a feminist satire and social commentary, mixed with some of the wildest body horror elements I’ve witnessed in a theater. Prosthetics and makeup effects designer Pierre-Olivier Persin really did a great job here, and the movie relying primarily on practical effects gives it the gross-out factor that CGI simply wouldn’t have been able to.
The actors are all doing great, Demi Moore and Margaret Qualley are nailing their roles and Quaid is doing an excellent portrayal of a Hollywood sleazeball. With several creative scenes showing just how much of a creep that guy is, and how ultimately unattractive he appears with his foul behavior, yet no one around him is disqualifying him from anything due to his age. Most of the male characters here (with some exceptions) are excessively gross, displayed as powerhungry horny pigs that are male-gazing every woman they see, and treating them with complete disrespect and even contempt if they do not “fit“ their standards. It’s a bit overtly stereotypical, but also straight to the point in a setting like this.
Now, regarding the protagonist: while Elisabeth’s situation is without a doubt something that can make you feel sorry for her, I actually had problems feeling that much sympathy for her. Her actions and behavior throughout the whole process went pretty far in showing that she was, after all, just as shallow as the people who rejected her. The younger version of herself, Sue, also goes a long way with portraying a very narcissistic persona with little respect towards Elisabeth. But as the company behind the substance clearly reminds her: they’re one and the same. They may be two, but they are both from the same material, and have the same traits, and they both idolize society’s beauty standards and strive to live up to it by all means possible. One could argue that Elisabeth had no choice in the matter since her whole life “fell apart“ after getting sacked, but…eh, no. It didn’t have to. In fact, there’s a scene where she meets an old acquaintance, Fred, who tells her she’s “just as beautiful as ever“ and really likes her for who she is. She later calls this guy up, setting up a date, but it’s obvious that the only reason she’s doing so is because she’s in need of an ego-boost, which doesn’t lead to anything of course because her frail ego botches the date and she sets him up. I’m going to be honest: the only character I felt genuine sympathy for here, was Fred…
Now, with a movie like this it’s hard not to also delve into the major themes here. We often point fingers at Hollywood for setting absurd beauty standards for the female body, but honestly, fingers could as easily be pointed backwards to ourselves. In movies, on social media, and pretty much everywhere, there’s a very obvious worship of youth and beauty. Fillers, botox, facelifts, implants, liposuction…all kinds of procedures to make people look “better“ are presented towards a younger and younger audience, where people as young as being in their 20s start taking botox injections. People’s self-esteem is worse than ever, and that’s not just Hollywood’s fault. Living in a society that almost deems aging as something unnatural that must be avoided at all costs, there’s bound to be unreasonable expectations. There was a weird little case here in Norway some years back, amongst the financial elite: two middle aged men started a fight, after one of them had said “sleeping with a woman over 40 is like sleeping with a corpse“. The other guy found this to be a preposterous claim and said (this being under the 2016 election in the US): “not even Trump would have said something like that“. It was later also talked about how looking down upon women is a jargon in certain parts of the financial elite society (as with so many other places). One may laugh about it, make jokes about it, but…it’s deeply rooted in so many parts of our society. Not everyone’s got the balls to stand up to it though.
The Substance is a brilliantly gross, wild and thought-provoking movie. Behind layers of glitz and glam, nudity and body horror, there’s also themes of loneliness and fear, about being rejected for who you are by the people around you for doing something none of us can avoid as long as we continue to live: growing older. And perhaps a little reminder that we should not measure our self worth from society’s standards, otherwise we just end up being another part of the problem. And that ending…wow! Without spoiling anything, I just want to say it really goes wild and doesn’t hold back. I guess that for some people who wanted a movie more grounded, they might be put off by it, but goddamn I loved every second!
The Substance is considered to be an unofficial remake of a movie called The Rejuvenator, from 1988.
Writer and director: Coralie Fargeat Country & year: France/USA, 2024 Actors: Margaret Qualley, Demi Moore, Dennis Quaid, Hugo Diego Garcia, Alexandra Papoulias Barton, Oscar Lesage, Joseph Balderrama, Robin Greer, Tiffany Hofstetter, Gore Abrams IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt17526714/
Ebony Jackson is a mother who’s struggling with an alcohol problem, and when drinking she’s often abusive towards her three children Nate, Shante and Dre. They have just moved into a new home, which is their third one within a short time. This time, Ebony’s mother Alberta has also moved in with them, a new-born Christian who’s suffering from cancer. As Ebony also has a criminal past, she’s under constant supervision from the Child Protective Services, and her caseworker Cynthia notices that things aren’t all that well in the house. And then the youngest in the home, Dre, starts talking to an imaginary friend called Tre. Yeah, that’s always good news. Flies start appearing inside the home, and Dre starts behaving strangely and is one day found in a catatonic state after having gone into the basement. Ebony now has to struggle with her constant cravings for alcohol, a problem that too easily lead her to being abusive towards the people in her life which she should have treated best of all, plus the Child Protective Services which are (and rightly so) keeping a close eye on her, and on top of all that there’s also something that seems to be possessing her own children and she’s at the risk of losing everything.
The Deliverance is a supernatural horror film directed by Lee Daniels, which was released on Netflix this year. It’s written by David Coggeshall and Elijah Bynum. The movie is inspired by the Ammons haunting case, which features the infamous Demon House which is no longer standing. The “true“ story goes like this: in November 2011, Latoya Ammons and her family of three children and her mother, moved into a house on Carolina Street in Gary, Indiana. Soon after moving in, they claimed black flies started swarming the porch, and things like footsteps in the basement, shadowy figures and other regular supernatural shenanigans started to happen. The family reached out to their physician for help, and he considered their behavior to be delusional which caused someone from his office calling the police, and the children were taken to the hospital where the youngest boy screamed and thrashed. When the Department of Child Services got involved in 2012, they believed the children were “performing“ for their mother, and sensational stories about the youngest by walking up the wall backwards started to get published in outlets such as New York Daily News. And then, like things often go with cases like this, a priest got involved and performed an exorcism. The family later moved to Indianapolis, and it’s said the events stopped after that. Then, in 2014, Zak Bagans from Ghost Adventures bought the house for $35.000, filmed a documentary in it which is titled Demon House. The house was demolished in January 2016.
Now, The Deliverance doesn’t stand out very much when it comes to demonic possession horror movies, and I have to honest and admit that I didn’t have very high expectations. We were intrigued due to the movie being based on this case, though, and we have also seen Demon House. What this movie does best, is not actually the supernatural parts, but the tension played out during the family drama, with the abusive alcoholic mother, her frightened children, and her cancer-suffering mother (who does the best possession scenes). And of course, the way it portrays poverty and the socioeconomics aspects. The start of the movie is without a doubt the most intriguing part, building up a tense atmosphere and establishes a sense of dread and mystery. The latter part of the movie goes into hackneyed demon possession fare, and drags along a bit too much. At least it uses demonic possession clichés rather sparingly, and lays off from overuse of CGI, which makes it easier to slog through. Overall, though, the movie is far from as bad as we initially thought it would be. In fact, the movie is on the whole pretty decent, it just doesn’t have the oomph to stand out very much.
So, all in all, The Deliverance doesn’t bring anything new that we haven’t already seen a plethora of times before, but it’s done with a solid hand.
Director: Lee Daniels Writers: David Coggeshall, Elijah Bynum Country & year: USA, 2024 Actors: Andra Day, Glenn Close, Anthony B. Jenkins, Caleb McLaughlin, Demi Singleton, Aunjanue Ellis-Taylor, Mo’Nique, Omar Epps, Miss Lawrence, Javion Allen, Todd Anthony, Bryant Bentley IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt4196566/
Deedle, deedle, Blackcoat’s Daughter. What was in the holy water? Gone to bed on an unclean head. The angels, they forgot her.
It’s February, and the students at the Catholic boarding school Bramford Academy are about to get picked up by their parents for a week-long break. Kat, a freshman at the school, wakes up from a nightmare where she’s witnessed her parents dying in a car crash. And later her parents do not arrive to pick her up, and they cannot be reached by phone. At the same time, a senior student named Rose suspects that she might be pregnant, and has lied to her parents about when to pick her up so she can buy some time to get things settled. Kat and Rose ends up being the only two left at the school, aside from two nuns. Kat starts acting weirder and weirder, and receives strange phone calls.
The Blackcoat’s Daughter (aka February, and also aka The Daughter of Evil) is a supernatural horror film from 2015 written and directed by Osgood Perkins. It was his directorial feature debut, and stars Kiernan Shipka as Kat, Emma Roberts as Joan and Lucy Boynton as Rose. While Perkins have made several slow-burn horror films during the years, including the Netflix film I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House (2016) and Gretel & Hansel (2020), he’s gotten most known for his recent satanic horror film Longlegs with Nicolas Cage himself playing a crazy satanic serial killer. And you could’ve easily believed that The Blackcoat’s Daughter belonged to the same universe, as they’re both having satanic devil-worship elements and the same dark, helpless nihilistic atmosphere. Just like the titular character in Longlegs, we here also meet a character who not only ends up becoming a victim to evil forces, but totally embraces it. The conventional portrayal of possessed people needing and wanting to be saved is turned completely upside down.
The Blackcoat’s Daughter is weighed with symbolism, with a narrative that explores the themes of mental illness, loneliness and longing, and how it can open up a crack that invites bad things in and lets them fester. The movie is divided in three parts, skipping a bit back and forth in time until we are left with the inevitably bleak and despairing ending. It’s a very dark and brooding film, never offering any kind of fast pace and the horror elements are often mostly subtle. It may require a bit of patience to fully get the most out of it, and is definitely a movie better suited for those that prefer slow atmospheric horror over fast-paced action and jumpscares. If you liked Osgood’s latest movie Longlegs, chances are you will also enjoy The Blackcoat’s Daughter.
Writer and director: Oz Perkins Country & year: USA/Canada, 2015 Also known as: The Daughter of Evil, February Actors: Emma Roberts, Kiernan Shipka, Lucy Boynton, James Remar, Lauren Holly, Greg Ellwand, Elana Krausz, Heather Tod Mitchell, Peter James Haworth, Emma Holzer, Peter J. Gray IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3286052/
Here comes the sequel that people actually have wanted to see for too long. Meanwhile, we had some videogames, comics, the awesome animated series, and I envy those who were lucky enough to experience the Broadway musicals that became huge successes. So, it’s fair to say that Beetlejuice’s spot and impact on pop-culture seemed to be bigger than we’d even realized. The time and years also came and went while the sequel was announced several times during the mid 2000s until it became the boy who cried wolf. It became too good to be true, but to be honest: I would rather wait for twenty years than see Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, whatever that was supposed to be. But now, only 37 years later, the juice is finally loose.
But still, my biggest concern here was how in hell they were going to recreate the same magic, vibe and the distinct cartoonish tone from the original without missing the mark and the perfect balance completely. Because it could easily have become a catastrophic, tone-deaf cringefest that would shuffle right in the same footsteps as Son of the Mask, to give the worst example. The year is also 2024, where legacy sequels have been pretty bland and forgettable, with some few exceptions. And then we have our favorite goth uncle, Tim Burton, who hasn’t quite been himself in a long, long time. Life happens to all of us. But that was until he directed the first episodes of Wednesday, where we saw some of his mojo coming back. So there was hope. Then came the teasers and the trailers and we were sold.
So, what’s the Deetz family been up to during all these years? Lydia Deetz is still herself, now as a professional medium, not a big surprise there, and has her own Paranormal TV show which she hosts with a live audience and all. And no, she’s not married to Zak Bagans. She’s been dating her producer, Rory (Justin Theroux), this film’s version of the eccentric Otho (until he isn’t). Lydia also has a daughter, Astrid (Jenna Ortega), and they don’t have the best relationship, since Astrid thinks her mother a complete whackjob and a fraud. It’s more complex than that, though. And, of course, she doesn’t believe in the supernatural at all. Her biological dad also died years ago and she can’t stand Rory.
Delia (Catherine O’Hara) is in Manhattan, New York, where she has an art exhibition. She’s still a redhead and a more borderline self-centered bitch than ever. But where’s Charles, Lydia’s dad, you ask? He is all by himself in the ghost house up on the hill, chilling the peaceful life, we have to assume. Wait, the phone is ringing. It’s Delia. Charles is dead, she says. Died during a plane crash. Oh… Time for an awkward little reunion in the small town of Winter River to arrange his funeral. And the old model still stands in the attic, Beetlejuice’s little loophole entry to the surface world.
Yes, there’s a lot of family drama going on, because there’s a lot to catch up to after almost four decades. But there’s no reason to worry – The showman himself, Beetlejuice (Michael Keaton), is just waiting for the right moment to join the reunion, and he has way more screentime than he had in the original, which was only 17 minutes. In the meantime, he’s kept himself busy with his Bio-Exorcist career, having a big open office space in the Neitherworld where he has a staff of Smallheads to do all the paper work.
Speaking of reunions: The Maitlands couple we saw in the original, played by Geena Davis and Alec Baldwin, is long gone and not to be seen. We get the point and reason why: ghosts don’t age. They get a brief mention by Lydia, who gives her own logical explanation of their absence just to tie the films together fittingly. Davis looks fabulous for her age, by the way, while Baldwin has morphed into the bitter rageaholic that he is. Teddybear Otho, on the other hand, isn’t even mentioned. And that broke my heart a little. Especially considering that Glenn Shadix fell in his home and died tragically of blunt head trauma in 2010. RIP.
Anyway – Meanwhile, downstairs in the world of the dead, we get to see a pretty wild entry of the films secondary villain. And that’s none other than Beetlejuice’s ex-wife, Dolores (Monica Bellucci), a cute mix of Corpse Bride and Sally from Nightmare Before Christmas. And you’ll also get a clear picture of why she meant nothing to him, nothing at all, as referred in the first film. It’s also hard to not feel some sympathy for Mr. Juice when some historical pieces are being put together. Because he absolutely means something to her, and not in some positive way. We also have a vital love-interest sideplot with Astrid and the neighbor boy Jeremy (Arthur Conti) which takes some pretty interesting turns.
Lydia is still haunted by the memories of Beetlejuice, who once tried to force her to marry him. She’s kept all of this a secret from her extended family, but when she starts to see quick flashes of him lurking everywhere she goes, the can of worms starts to open. The plot starts to thicken when both Astrid and Rory find out about this Beetleguy, and it’s just a quick matter of time when one of them can’t resist the temptation to spit out his name three times.
And when the news came that Willem Dafoe had been added to the cast, I was pretty sure that he was going to play Jacques LaLean from the animated series. Instead, we meet Wolf Jackson, a former action star, who’s now living out his fantasies in the afterlife as a police officer in the Neitherword. And for some reason, he’s on the tail on both Beetlejuice and Dolores.
I was a little surprised how practical and old-school the film actually was, both when it came to the effects and especially the sets. Because the cynical side of me just assumed they would CGI/green screen the whole Winter River town and the ghost house itself, because that’s what Hollywood normally does these days. Instead, we also have a sweet nostalgia trip to the quiet little town of East Corinth, hidden somewhere in the forest countryside of Vermont. And the Neitherworld is a whole place by itself where we get to see more of with its crooked, narrow, colorful hallways and chess floors, a place you’d like to explore for yourself. Maybe some day.
Tim Burton’s zany imagination and inspiration is back in full force here. So is his energy, which makes Beetlejuice Beetlejuice feel way more of a passion project than just another sequel. I bet everyone had a blast making this, not to mention the make-up crew who had all the different types of dead people we see in the world downstairs to work with. Every aspect to the smallest details are done with such care, love and respect to the original, without overstuffing us with shallow member berries. We have some of those, of course, but they’re really tasty.
We also have some references from the old times, such as Beetlejuice’s backstory told in the stylish black & white style of Mario Bava, and get ready for the roller-coaster ride that is the Soul Train. It’s crazy, wild, chaotic, unpredictable and lots of fun. A big morbid cinematic Halloween candy bag with some even more unexpected surprises. The older fans who grew up with the original, and the animated series in the early 90s, will definitely feel the warm and fuzzy nostalgia bug.
Michael Keaton still nails every step and tone of the title character. He slips right into Beetlejuice and the iconic outfit as if it was 1988. The slapstick, the small tics and details with his bizarre mannerism, are still intact with the perfect balance without being too much. And after pushing 70, and blessed with some excellent genes, Keaton plays the role as if he was 41 with a body full of demons. All the co-actors do a solid job and I liked the more nuances in the family dynamic between Lydia and her stepmom Delia, which was very one-dimensional in the first film. The one I wish had more screentime was Dolores.
And to finally address the real boogeyman in the room, that is Jeffrey Jones, who played Lydia’s dad in the first film. Yeah, whatever happened to him. He’s a registered sex offender, if you didn’t already know, and hasn’t been doing anything acting related since 2014. And since this isn’t a Disney production, he is persona non grata. Still, Charles is in the movie, in some very bizarre, morbid and hilarious way. And he’s actually way more present than I expected. Also, what they did to his character without writing him off completely was pure genius, comedy gold, and I laughed every time when that poor fucker popped up on the screen.
The music here must also be mentioned, which is just fantastic. It’s classic Danny Elfman, and he really pours his ghoulish heart into every single note and detail. He gives a more thick and sinister tone to the classic opening theme, like he did with Batman Returns (1992). The opening credit sequence is another aspect, which, in all honesty, I didn’t expect until that old Geffen logo came and did its rotation on screen. I knew already then that we were in for a ride. So, by all means; please take notes and bring back the classic themesongs and opening credits again, because they rule.
The film earned back its budget already during the opening weekend, so there’s no reason for the Warner brothers to not say his name one last time with Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. In the meantime, you can now bingewatch all four seasons of the animated series on Tubi.
Director: Tim Burton Writers: Alfred Gough, Miles Millar, Seth Grahame-Smith Country & year: USA, 2024 Actors: Michael Keaton, Winona Ryder, Catherine O’Hara, Jenna Ortega, Justin Theroux, Willem Dafoe, Monica Bellucci, Arthur Conti, Nick Kellington, Santiago Cabrera, Burn Gorman, Danny DeVito IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt2049403/
She’s a killer, she’s a thriller. And a ballcrusher. But most of all – she’s Maxine FUCKING Minx!
So, after waiting for two months after the official theatrical release, we finally got to see MaXXXine on the big screen here in Norway. Two months to avoid any spoilers and such. So let’s fucking gooooo!
MaXXXine takes place in 1985, six years after the incidents at the farm we saw in X which have been reported in the news as the greatest film title never released: “The Texas Porn Star Massacre“. Since then, Maxine still snorts lines, lives in a small apartment in Los Angeles, and still works in the porn biz. Like a character from GTA, she’s been upgraded to have an agent (Giancarlo Esposito, Gus from Breaking Bad) that is actually not a shady sleazeball, and earn enough decent money to not stay in Cecil Hotel. Writer and director Ti West throws no punches to set the tone and takes us far into the memory lane of a country in full moral panic. Rock and heavy metal have consumed the youth, parents freak out as their kids listen to Twisted Sister, Mötley Crüe, Judas Priest, etc. Dee Snider is at full war with Tipper Gore who wants to censor his music. Yes, there was actually a time when music was the most evil thing on planet Earth, in God-fearing America, at least. The first wave of the Satanic panic has hit full force as the serial killer, and the self-proclaimed Satanist, Richard Ramirez (aka The Night Stalker), is body counting around the city. Yet a far more innocent USA than it is today.
Anyway – life isn’t as bad as someone in Maxine’s situation should be, even though she’s clearly very damaged and struggles with PTSD. But life goes on. Especially if you want to get a chance to star in a Hollywood film. And now, as Maxine is in her mid 30s and wants to be in “real movies“ and climb the career ladder up to the more mainstream surface, she sees the opportunity to audition for a horror movie called Puritan II. And since Maxine is a phenomenal actress as Mia Goth, she impresses the director Elizabeth Bender (Elizabeth Debicki) and secures the role on the spot. Yay! The producers are not so keen on casting her, though, with her filthy porn background and all. Well, we all have to start somewhere.
But the road to her Hollywood break isn’t getting that easy when she gets a VHS mysteriously delivered at her doorstep. On the tape we see clips of her from “The Farmer’s Daughters”, which was filmed at the farm that she does her best to forget. A sleazy weasel of a dude (Kevin Bacon) dressed like Jack Nicholson from Chinatown tracks her down to blackmail and paint her as the killer in the so far unsolved murder mystery in the Texas Porn massacre case, if she doesn’t do as told. In the meantime, friends and colleagues within her porn circle starts to get killed in brutal ways by an obscure person in a giallo outfit.
X was the throwback of the 1970s, the standalone prequel and character study of Pearl was filled with 1930s Technicolor, and this one the neon-soaked 1980s. Three different eras with three distinct styles. And of all the 80s throwback films that have been spewed out during the last twenty years or so, I dare to say that Ti West has come closest to duplicating the style flawlessly. Whereas similar attempts come across more like parodies, MaXXXine feels more natural, organic and like a pure 80s film from start to finish. The way it’s shot, edited, the music and how the characters behave, the overall vibe and atmosphere, is perfection. Tarantino should be jealous. Maxine is also a character easy to vibe with and root for, many thanks to Mia Goth, who deserves all the praise she can get.
One would expect Mia Goth to outshine the whole cast, but surprisingly, there isn’t one character here that I found shallow. We have a frustrated good cop, bad cop duo that really do their best to get the link between Maxine and the killer. And Maxine is caught in the middle of the urban crossfire while she just wants to get on with her life, until she has no choice but to get her claws out. Kevin Bacon also seemed to have a really fun time here as the side-kick villain. And just like Maxine, if we’re going to ignore the porn, Kevin Bacon also got his start in a horror movie, that is Friday the 13th (1980). Lily Collins grinning from ear to ear while having her face smeared with fake blood was super cute. And it warms my ghoulish heart to see the Psycho house, which is a character by itself, still standing in the Universal Studios Lot and being taken care of.
The soundtrack is also filled with 80s music, all from ZZ Top to synth pop like Animotion. We also hear tunes from New Order, Frankie Goes to Hollywood, Ratt, Judas Priest, and more. I must point out a lost opportunity to use the song Ballcrusher by W.A.S.P. here, though. And you know what scene I’m talking about. The film ends (—UH-OH SPOILER—) appropriately enough with Bette Davis Eyes, which the film also pays a tribute to.
Yeah, I’m really creaming all over MaXXXine, maybe because the film was much better than expected after the more lukewarm reception. We had an overall blast with this one in the movie theater and wasn’t bored for one second. The common complaints I’ve noticed is the third act/the reveal/the last ten minutes. The ending is predictable, for sure, and the reveal didn’t come as a shocker. No spoilers here, but I really loved how the film painted Christianity as an equally bad thing, for lack of a better word, as Satanism. What a big, fat middle-finger to flash straight in the face to moral activists.
Writer and director: Ti West Country & year: USA, 1985 2024 Actors: Mia Goth, Kevin Bacon, Giancarlo Esposito, Elizabeth Debicki, Michelle Monaghan, Bobby Cannavale, Moses Sumney, Halsey, Chloe Farnworth, Charley Rowan McCain, Simon Prast, Lily Collins IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt22048412/
– AAhh..AAAhhh, FUCK ma PUSSY! You make me so WEEEH…!!
The year is 1979 where the young 27-year-old Maxine (Mia Goth) snorts a big, fat line to get ready for another day in the porn biz. She wants to be famous and no one can blame her for being a runaway daughter of a Kenneth Copeland-like televangelist. We’re in hot n’ sticky Texas where she and a small film crew are driving to the middle of Leatherface land to shoot their next porn flick titled “The Farmer’s Daughters”. No hitchhiker to spot here, just to mention, their trip goes as smoothly as a stiff, slippery cock sliding into a freshly-shaved vagina. They drive by a nasty and gory accident scene, though, where a poor cow has been sliced in two after a clash with a truck that makes Maxine throw up in the car. Welcome to Texas, even though it’s all filmed in Queenstown, New Zealand.
Our crew is the producer and Maxine’s boyfriend Wayne (Martin Henderson), RJ (Owen Campbell) is the director, his girlfriend, Lorraine, (Jenna Ortega) is the one holding the dick… sorry, the mick, and she’s the youngest on the crew. She’s shy and doesn’t say much, but you can bet she has a horny little beast hidden in her shell, just waiting to get unleashed. We also have Maxine’s two co-actors, the BBC Jackson (Kid Cudi) and the blonde chick Bobby-Lynn (Brittany Snow).
Their destination is an old farm owned by the old, miserable and one-foot-in-the-grave couple, Howard and Pearl, who are way past their glory hole days. The natural circle that we call life is harsh and brutal and is not for everybody to embrace gracefully. Howard is a goblin-and bedbug-bitten-looking gentleman who’s agreed to rent out a guesthouse to the crew as long they mind their own business and stay away from the main house. Pearl, who looks like the witch from Pumpkinhead, is quick to get her old, half-dead eyes lazer-focused on Maxine. Because she reminds her of her younger self, and gets jealous of her youth. And Howard is too afraid to have a heart attack if he tries to sexually please her. I think they would both have a heart attack, to be honest. But it’s worth a try, because what is there to lose at this point. Pearl is also played by Mia Goth, hidden by a thick layer of convincing old-age makeup.
Anyway, Pearl gets more drawn to her in some creepy, obsessive way and starts mirroring her like a true, deranged narcissist. Some may sympathize with Pearl, but I don’t. I know the kind too well. And….well, I think I’ve said enough about the plot.
The film takes its time to build up the more and more eerie mood and atmosphere, and the uncertainty of where the plot is actually going. After the quick flashback in the opening scene (which I forgot to mention) where the local cops find a horrific murder scene in the farm basement, we have a foreshadowing tone from the start that slowly builds up. So, this is not your typical fast-paced teen-slasher, in other words. It’s after the first hour mark that the horror elements really start to kick in, and it goes full slasher-mode from there on.
Our small group of actors does a solid job with their roles and have great chemistry. They’re also likable and well-written, which is a big plus since we spend a lot of time with them. It was also somewhat peculiar to see Jenna Ortega in a far more pure and innocent role (until she isn’t) after watching the first season of Wednesday. Mia Goth is, of course, the big star here as the rebellious young Maxine who just wants to be famous and prove her dad a thing or two. She’s at her best, if not intense, when playing the old, fragile and unhinged Pearl, where it’s hard to at least not feel some pity for her.
There isn’t too much to say about X without tipping the toes too far into spoiler territory – but overall, X is a rough and decent 1970s-sexploitation throwback flick with some gnarly, brutal kills and raunchy soft-core nudeness – and not least with a unique angle on the slasher genre. Ti West knows his stuff when it comes to the visual aesthetics from that era, which he also nailed in The House of the Devil (2009). The film should have gone full-out hardcore with the sex scenes, though, so it could’ve gone full circle with an actual X-rating. That would have been fun.
X followed up with the sequels XX and XXX and can be found after some quick searches on PornHub. Har-har, just kidding. Watch out for Pearl and the recent MaXXXine.
Writer and director: Ti West Country & year: USA/New Zealand, 2022 Actors: Mia Goth, Jenna Ortega, Brittany Snow, Kid Cudi, Martin Henderson, Owen Campbell, Stephen Ure, James Gaylyn, Simon Prast, Geoff Dolan, Matthew J. Saville, Bryony Skillington IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt13560574/
Julia is married to Francis, who has a mother from Romania but grew up in USA. One day, he gets a promotion at work and is relocated to Bucharest, so it’s time to pack the bags and move to Romania. They move into an apartment building where the windows face the opposite building. Julia spends a lot of time on her own as Francis works long hours, and she gets more and more unnerved by seeing a man in the building across the street, who just stands there and appears to be watching her all the time. Her fears aren’t exactly subsided when she and Francis one day comes over a commotion on the street with an ambulance, police and a crowd of people. Apparently they just found the body of another victim of “The Spider“, a serial killer who decapitates young women. Like this wasn’t more than enough to fray her nerves, she’s also struggling with finding her place in a city where she doesn’t know anyone, and doesn’t speak the language. She befriends one of the few english-speaking neighbors, Irina, which appears to ease her mind a little. One night, when she stands looking out the window, the “watcher“ is at his usual place. She wonders if he actually is looking at her, hoping she might be wrong, and decides to test it by gently waving at him. At first, the man just stands there like he hasn’t seen anything, but then he waves back. And things spiral into something that’s completely out of Julia’s control.
Watcher is a psychological thriller from 2022, written and directed by Chloe Okuno as her feature directorial debut. It was filmed in Bucharest, Romania. The movie is based on an original screenplay by Zack Ford, and stars Maika Monroe as Julia, Karl Glusman as Francis, and Burn Gorman as the watcher. It had its world premiere at the Sundance Film Festival and was later theatrically released in the US, mostly to positive reviews. It still only made a total of $3.2 million against a budget of $5 million.
The movie follows a woman who moves to a new country with her husband, feeling alienated and alone in unfamiliar surroundings. The language barrier only adds to the feeling of being alone, and with her husband being so busy at work she hardly knows how to pass the time and make herself fit in within a world not quite her own. The pacing is slow (yep, another slow-burner), but it gives you enough time to get a proper grip on the isolation and paranoia that builds within the protagonist. You also can’t help but wondering if Julia is just a bit too paranoid for her own good: what is a real threat, and what is caused by her misconceptions and fear? When she’s standing in the window watching the watcher…then who is actually watching who? Yes, the movie does play along with the idea of making you question everything, but we also experience everything Julia does, positioning us in the same isolation she feels and with the same experiences. Thus, we do not necessarily question that something is wrong here, we just don’t know to what extent, and this makes it all the more thrilling.
Watcher is a suspenseful movie filled with paranoia and anxiety, and definitely worth a watch if you want a slow-burning mystery thriller.
Fun fact: when Julia wanders around in Bucharest and decides to visit the Cinema, she watches Charade (1963). It’s the same movie that was played in It Follows (2014) when Jay (played by Maika Monroe) and Greg went to the movies together.
Director: Chloe Okuno Writers: Zack Ford, Chloe Okuno Country & year: USA/Romania, 2022 Actors: Maika Monroe, Karl Glusman, Burn Gorman, Tudor Petrut, Gabriela Butuc, Madalina Anea, Cristina Deleanu, Bogdan Farcas, Daniel Nuta, Ioana Abur, Flaviu Crisan, Stefan Iancu IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt12004038/
Bloodlust: Subspecies III starts right off where the previous one ended. And now it gets real serious when Radu has taken all control over his dear bride, Michelle. The Stockholm Syndrome (or the Transylvanian Syndrome, if you will) has started to slightly hit while she does her best to maintain the last few fibers she has left of humanity. Michelle’s sister, Becky, is still in Romania trying to save her with the help of Mel.
