Satan’s Slaves (2017)

Satan's SlavesWe’re in the Indonesian countryside, and the year is 1981. Mawarni, a once famous singer, has fallen ill and she is now bedridden. The royalties from Mawarni’s singing career are long gone as her popularity has faded, along with her health, so the family is also struggling financially. Their four children, 22-year old Rini, 16-year old Toni, 10-year old Bondu and 6-year old Ian who is deaf, are all trying to cope with the situation. The inevitable happens, and Mawarni dies. Shortly after her burial, Bahri, the husband, must travel to town in order to raise money for the mortgage payments. Rini, together with their grandmother Rahma, is now at home while experiencing strange events as they seem to be haunted by a ghostly presence. They also have the creepiest, most uncanny bathroom ever, with a well and all, where their grandmother eventually ends up dead inside. Was it an accident…or something else at play? Things go from bad to worse as there are more and more obvious signs of occult interference, and as Rini starts looking further into her deceased mother’s past, she finds there are ties to a Satanic cult.

 

Satan’s Slaves (Indonesian: Pengabdi Setan) is a supernatural horror film from Indonesia, released in 2017. It’s written and directed by Joko Anwar, and it’s a loose remake-prequel to the 1982 film which is called Satan’s Slave (and which we have already reviewed here on Horror Ghouls). Ever since starting his film-making career, Joko Anwar desired to make a remake of the original Pengabdi Setan. It was even his inspiration for becoming a filmmaker in the first place, after sneaking into a theater to watch it as a kid during the 80’s and then getting the full-on heebie jeebies from it. It’s the movies that scare the crap out of you as a kid that really gives the best inspiration later on, innit? Once he got everything sorted for the film’s creation, it took the production team four months (!) to seek out the perfect filming location to accurately represent the 80’s in which the film is taking place. Originally they wanted to film in Puncak Bogor, West Java, but the owner didn’t give them permission, so they had to continue the quest for the perfect place to film. They eventually hit the jackpot when they found an old house in the Pangalengan area, which they later redesigned to make it fit the 80’s aesthetic.

 

While the original Satan’s Slave from 1982 has some really good visuals and is quite atmospheric despite its rather cheesy vibe, it never really manages to come off as scary (probably a different story if you’re a kid during the 80’s sneaking into the movie theater to see it). Joko Anwar’s prequel/remake is totally different, delivering a brooding, dark vibe throughout. It mixes family drama, dark secrets, folklore and the occult in an investigative haunted house wrap, often reminiscent of the early Conjuring films. I guess you could say that Joko Anwar is Indonesia’s answer to James Wan.

 

There’s a lot of creepy visuals here, and the house where the family lives is always dark and gloomy. There’s even a bathroom with a well that looks like something straight out from a nightmare or a slightly surreal horror video game. Here, we do of course get several spooky scenes, including the death of the grandmother. As if the bathroom/well room wasn’t creepy and uncomfortable enough, there are also some scenes where two of the kids are urinating on the floor like the entire place is supposed to be a giant toilet. And no, this wasn’t supposed to be tied to any supernatural/occult stuff. It was…oddly disgusting. And I still have no idea why the hell this was a thing…

 

The story progression in the film is following a somewhat casual horror-investigation-mystery thread, where occult things start happening and the protagonist/s must try to figure out the who, why and what. With the title of the film, I guess it comes as no surprise that there is some kind of satanic goings-on here. And, yes, it’s in the veins of a regular family gets haunted type of story, but with a different kind of flair than what we’re normally used to. I also really love the soundtrack, especially the vintage song Kelam Malam which has that perfect spooky oldie days vibe (I’m also a sucker for oldies music). The songs were performed by The Spouse, Aimee Saras and ‘Tony Marle’.

 

Satan’s Slaves was a huge success in Indonesia, and ended up being the highest grossing Indonesian film during the year of its release, and it is indeed a very solid entry into the haunted house genre. There was later made a sequel, called Satan’s Slaves 2: Communion. And this one amps up the scares with a ton! Also check out Joko Anwar’s Impetigore from 2019.

 

Satan's Slaves Satan's Slaves

 

Writer and director: Joko Anwar
Original title: Pengabdi Setan
Country & year: Indonesia/South Korea, 2017
Actors: Tara Basro, Bront Palarae, Dimas Aditya, Endy Arfian, Nasar Annuz, M. Adhiyat, Arswendy Bening Swara, Egy Fedly, Ayu Laksmi, Elly D. Luthan
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7076834/

 

Original: Satan’s Slave (1982)

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

The Gate (1987)

The GateThe movie opens with the nightmare of Glen, a 12 year old boy. He dreams that his home is abandoned, and he goes out to the backyard to enter his tree-house, where is gets struck by lightning. He wakes to a somewhat uncanny coincidence as he sees that some workers in the backyard have cut down the same tree. He and his friend Terry later discovers that the removal of the tree has unearthed a large geode, and at the same time Glen is catching a splinter and leaves a little bit of blood behind. And of course we know that this little detail is going to have some sort of significance later on…and yup, shortly afterwards some strange things start happening.

 

Then Glen’s parents are going to leave town for three days, and Glen’s older sister Alexandra (whom he refers to as Al for short) will look after him. Al, being a 15 year old girl, immediately gets in contact with her friends to make proper use of the situation and throws a party. While she’s partying with her friends downstairs, Glen and Terry are in Glen’s room. Terry’s brought with him his LP of a heavy metal band called Sacrifyx, as he found a booklet inside the vinyl album that describes some eerie resemblances to the hole in Glen’s backyard and the strange events that followed. They play the record backwards, which of course ends up opening the gate fully. Good work, lads. Downstairs, Glen and Terry discovers that Al and her friends are playing some sort of levitation game, and wants Glen to try it. At this point I was surprised they didn’t bring out a ouija board too just to out the cherry on top. Supposed to be just a silly game, Glen starts levitating for real, causing everyone to freak out. And that’s only the beginning. Something has started a chain of supernatural events, all of it in preparation for something bigger to come…

 

The Gate is a supernatural horror film from 1987, directed by Tibor Takács and written by Michael Nankin. The movie was a co-production between Canada and the United States, and has since its release gotten itself a cult following.

 

There are always some films you watch at an older age, and think oh boy, I wish I’d seen that one when I was a kid. The Gate is definitely one of those. It’s got all the perfect ingredients for a spooky movie that can be watched and enjoyed by a younger audience. The plot is somewhat simple: children discover that a gate to hell has opened in their backyard, and they must try to close it before all hell literally breaks lose. The kid characters are your typical smarter than average and definitely smarter than the adults kind, which were often a thing in movies like this. Most interactions are between the protagonist Glen, his buddy Terry, and the sister Al, and their chemistry is fine. None of the characters are especially memorable, but they work for the setting.

 

The movie is using several techniques for the visual effects, including some good old-fashioned stop-motion animation, forced perspective, and of course the classic rubber suits. Ah, the good old 80’s. Towards the ending we get some really crazy scenes with all kinds of demonic and otherworldly elements, including tiny demons (which reminded me a bit of the subspecies in Subspecies), a zombie, and of course a big, big bad. And all of it because of a heavy metal band! Fits right in with the 80’s Satanic panic.

 

The Gate is a fun 80’s horror with lots of cool practical effects and the typical whimsical 80’s tone, filled with heavy metal, demons, practical and stop-motion effects. It’s one of those light-horror movies speckled with a lot of whimsical fantasy and fun times, never getting heavy in the gore or anything that could be considered particularly scary, which makes it work pretty good as a gateway horror. Fits fell with the title too, I guess.

 

In 1990, a sequel called The Gate II: The Trespassers was released. A 3D-remake was also scheduled to have a release in 2011, but nothing ever came of that.

 

The Gate The Gate

 

Director: Tibor Takacs
Writer: Michael Nankin
Country & year: Canada, 1987
Actors: Stephen Dorff, Christa Denton, Stephen Dorff, Louis Tripp, Kelly Rowan, Jennifer Irwin, Deborah Grover, Scot Denton, Ingrid Veninger, Sean Fagan, Linda Goranson
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093075/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

Braindead (1992)

BraindeadThere’s actually film experts out there that are snobby enough to flat-out refuse to acknowledge Peter Jackson’s horror films pre Lord of the Rings. Well, more carnage goodies for the rest of us.

 

This unhinged goreshow from New Zealand starts at Skull Island, of all places, shot at the famous Pūtangirua Pinnacles. The year is 1957 and a team from Wellington Zoo has just trapped a Sumatran rat monkey in a small wooden crate. As they hurry back to the jeep, they get stopped by a group of natives who strongly advise them to not bring the monkey to the mainland. Because this is The Skull Island, after all. After they’ve run to the jeep with the natives on their tails, Stewart, the zoo official, gets bitten. The little bugger bit me, he says. Uh-oh. And the only cure for that is…singaya! His local guide kicks him off the jeep, picks up a machete and chops him to pieces after a scar pops up from his hands to his forehead. The gory cartoonish title card for Braindead, which alone sets the whole tone for what to expect, spatters to the screen just when they chop the poor man’s skull. What an intro!

 

After the rat monkey has been brought safely to New Zealand, we get introduced to the young and handsome, yet clumsy and awkward man Lionel, who lives with his mum, Vera, at a big house in the hills of Wellington. And we quickly learn that his mother is a guilt-tripping, narcissistic, bitter old hag who wants her boy all to herself. Yes, she’s one of those. Things change when he meets Paquita, a Spanish bird who works as a clerk in the local grocery store, and probably the very first female he ever had an interaction with. Love is finally in the air for Lionel as they go on a date to the zoo.

 

Jealous mum Vera spies on them around the zoo until she suddenly slips on a banana peel, holds on to some iron bars which are far enough from each other for the rat-monkey to take a good bite of her left arm. Her screams can be heard all up to North Korea. And, seriously, if it was that easy for the deadly monkey to reach that far from the cage, this would already happen on day one. Mum slams the monkey down with her purse and plunges the poor bugger to death with her high heels. And mum now has a new great excuse to keep her boy to herself as she needs daily medical care. So, love is in the backburner, for now.

 

Braindead

 

The disease spreads slowly enough, so mum can have a painful death as she falls apart and transforms into a rabid zombie while poor Lionel does everything in his naive power to help her. Mum almost rips the head off nurse Tavish with her bare hands, which makes her head hanging upside-down from her neck. Lionel quickly throws her and mum in the basement, where he soon will have a fine collection of other stiffs. But as we say: context is everything. Mum manages to escape and shuffles her way into town where she gets hit by a tram and finally dies. Well, so we thought. The next on schedule is a messy, disastrous funeral where the scummy, sleazy and sadistic uncle Les is having a big fat schadenfreude belly-laugh. And we’ll see more of Uncle Les, you can bet on that. Poor Lionel.

 

After she gets put to the ground, Lionel pays a visit the same night to pull an Ed Gein and dig her up. Because he believes that she’s still alive and, like the good loyal son that he is, he has to take care of her. A group of drunk hooligans pops up and get the funny idea by pissing on Vera’s grave. It’s my mother you’re pissing on, says Lionel, as he just expects what to happen next. Mum’s hand burst out of the soil, grabs the dick, and…well, the juice is loose! Lionel injects the zombies with some strong sedatives that he bought on the black market from a neo-Nazi and hides them back home in the basement. Uncle Les throws a big house party after that greasy slob has ensured himself to inherit the house after some blackmailing. And of course, the stiffs downstairs want to chime in. This will be a fun night to remember. Oh yes, indeed.

 

There’s so much insane shit going on here where we have the one classic moment after another. We have two dinner scenes, the one more gross than the other. And all I can say is not to eat custard pudding while watching. Stick to popcorn or something very crisp. Just trust me on that one. The I Kick Ass for the Lord scene alone is Oscar worthy, and that the Kung fu priest looks like Father Ted, makes the icing on the cake. This Uncle Les guy also reminds me of someone but I can’t quite put the finger on it. Maybe you can (haha). A zombie baby is born where we have a wholesome moment where Lionel is out with the newborn in a park, hidden behind a net of bar wires in his carriage. This scene is Peter Jackson’s own favorite. The 1950s setting with its rockabilly atmosphere also gives Braindead its own unique flair and some extra charm. The effects, which are all from stop-motion, practical to puppetry, are top-tier with a handful of gleefully morbid gags.

 

Overall, there isn’t a single dull moment here, and Peter Jackson’s unique directing style, his great sense of morbid, absurd gallows splatstick humor, makes it worth quoting narrator Percy Rodriguez, who says it best in the trailer: a modern masterpiece of horror. Well, not so modern anymore, but still a masterpiece.

 

And then we have the big question: is this the goriest film ever made? Could be. Just in the final scene alone, the one with the lawnmower, 300 liters of fake blood was used, five gallons per second. The legend says that they’re still cleaning up the sets. All the leftovers that weren’t used were pumped into the Hutt river not so far from Wellington, and the production got into trouble when the residents saw the river turning red and contacted the authorities as they thought there was a serious massacre going on. Well, that wasn’t too far from the truth. So, with that trivia gold-nugget alone, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is actually the goriest film ever made.  Premutos – The Fallen Angel (1997) is maybe the one who comes closest.

 

Braindead isn’t available on any streaming services as far as I know, and the old DVD’s that were released way back in the day are out-of-print. And the talks and rumors of an official 4K UHD release, along with Bad Taste and Meet the Feebles, have been going on for so many years now with a numerous of coming next year announcements that we just have to see it to believe it. The only thing to dig up is a Spanish DVD/Blu-ray and I have no idea what that one looks like.

 

Braindead Braindead Braindead

 

 

 

Director: Peter Jackson
Writers: Stephen Sinclair, Fran Walsh, Peter Jackson
Also known as: Dead Alive (North America)
Country & year: New Zealand, 1992
Actors: Timothy Balme, Diana Peñalver, Elizabeth Moody, Ian Watkin, Brenda Kendall, Stuart Devenie, Jed Brophy, Elizabeth Brimilcombe, Stephen Papps, Murray Keane, Glenis Levestam, Lewis Rowe
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103873/

 

Tom Ghoul

 

 

 

 

Brainscan (1994)

BrainscanMicheal Brower is a teen who lives a very lonely life. His mother was killed in a car accident, where his leg was permanently injured, and nowadays his father is mostly absent. He spends most of his days alone in the house, watching horror movies and playing video games, and spying on his neighbor crush Kimberly. His only friend, Kyle, is a misfit just like himself, and they’re both members of the school’s Horror Club. One day, Kyle tells Michael about this ultra-realistic horror game called Brainscan. Michael, of course, gets interested and soon has the first disc of the game in his mail. Upon starting the game, he is warned that the game is using what is similar to hypnotism, and soon Michael finds himself in a game that looks just as real as life itself. The game’s host, simply referred to as Trickster, greets him in an exaggerated and almost clownish way, and encourages him to go on a psycho-murder spree. Why not…it’s just a game, right? The first level of the game includes Michael going into a stranger’s home, murdering him and taking the man’s foot as a trophy. Then, after finishing the game’s current mission and getting back to real life, he finds himself both a little confused and thrilled about the experience. That is…until the next day, when he discovers that the exact same murder happened close to his home. Did he really kill someone that night? When Michael refuses to continue playing the game, the Trickster materializes and torments him, until he’s got no choice but to continue playing…

 

Brainscan is a horror film from 1994, directed by John Flynn and written by Andrew Kevin Walker. The script for the movie was originally centered around a VHS tape, but producer Michel Roy did some uncredited re-writes which turned the VHS into a CD-ROM video game, which would suit the times better with the growing fascination of virtual reality. Even the Trickster was Michel Roy’s invention, as the original script only included a voice that kept calling Michael by phone.

 

The premise of Brainscan is definitely intriguing. Virtual Reality had its real take-off in popularity during the early 90’s, despite there being several other attempts much earlier, like Morton Heilig’s Sensorama from the 1950’s, which was an arcade-style theatre cabinet with stereo speakers, stereoscopic 3D display, generators for smells and a vibrating chair (ladies must’ve loved that particular feature), and Ivan Sutherland’s Ultimate Display concept, for example. For a very long time, we have been fascinated with the idea of experiencing some kind of reality where one could experience things that are not possible in the real world…or do things without any consequences. So the idea of a Virtual Reality game, so real that it feels like life itself, is a concept that probably felt both near and far in the early 90’s. And this movie really tries to show Michael off as some real high-tech boy with all the latest gadgets, having a large room in the attic/upper floor filled with video game, heavy metal and horror memorabilia. He even has his own computer-Igor answering his phone calls and all (if I had watched this movie as a kid, I would’ve been envious as fuck). Still, it’s one of those typical 90’s movie settings where the high tech almost seem a little alternative-reality like…there’s just something so weird about movies where imagined near future technology is presented in such an odd old-fashioned way. I kind of find it a little charming, in its own peculiar way.

 

While the video game itself is more or less the villain here, there’s a personification of it through the character Trickster who looks like a mishmash of Alice Cooper, Freddy Krueger, Steven Tyler and Mok Swagger. Mostly an overtly jolly (and somewhat obnoxious) character that is all in for the fun and games, as long as you still wanna play. Once Michael wants out, it becomes clear that this is a game you’ll have to play until the end. Whether that means the game’s end or your own…

 

While the movie is cheesy as hell, it manages to be suspenseful enough during the scenes where Michael is trying to figure out what really happened and how he can possibly get out of this mess. It’s a fun ride from start to finish, and then, of course, the movie also offers a little bit of a surprise in the ending, which ought to get a little chuckle out of most people. Too bad we didn’t get the sequel.

 

Brainscan is one of those rather hidden 90’s horror gems, not a classic by any means, but one that has more than enough cheesy fun for you to enjoy which undoubtedly also plays in a bit on the nostalgia…at least for us older ghouls.

 

Brainscan Brainscan Brainscan

 

Director: John Flynn
Writers: Brian Owens, Andrew Kevin Walker
Country & year: USA, 1994
Actors: Edward Furlong, Frank Langella, T. Ryder Smith, Amy Hargreaves, Jamie Galen, Victor Ertmanis, David Hemblen, Vlasta Vrana
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109327/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

Reptilicus (1961)

ReptilicusMonster schlock madness from Denmark. We’re of course talking about the one and only… REPTILICUS! Be afraid. Be very afraid! This is also known for being the one and (for the time being) only sea monster flick that was made, not only in Denmark, but in Scandinavia. And if the poster itself wasn’t enough to set the tone right away, then let’s just say that this is the type of film that Ed Wood would have made, if he hadn’t become best friends with Jack Daniels and Martini Rosso.

 

How to even start with this absurd, mental clownshow … yes, it’s one of those. Well, it’s important to know that the film was simultaneously made in two versions, in Danish and in English for American audiences. Poul Bang directed the Danish version while the American version was done by Sidney W. Pink. The shooting was as simple as right after Poul Bang shot his scene, Sidney Pink took over and shot his scene for the American version. And of course, not all the Danish actors could speak English very well, so some dubbing had to be added. Why they just didn’t dub the whole thing from the Danish version to both save a lot of time and money, god knows.

 

The Danish version was released in Denmark by Saga Studios in 1961, and the English-speaking version was released in the US by American International Pictures in 1963. And yes, both versions exists.

 

Reptilicus starts somewhere in the forest of Lapland where a group of oil-drilling miners digs up a mysterious tail from a prehistoric monster that has been frozen for thousands of years. C o o l. After it is transported to Denmark’s Aquarium in Copenhagen, it soon looks like the tail is actually in the process of regenerating itself into a brand-new animal. Or maybe a… monster! And then there’s this mentally-challenged caretaker, whom I’ll come back to. The whole crew at the aquarium goes for a cabin trip, while we spend some time with General Greyson at the famous Tivoli Gardens. Here we have a song number by none other than the famous Danish Eurovision representative Birthe Wilke who sings her song Tivoli Nights. What a cute Ad for tourism, nevertheless. Tivoli Gardens is still spinning, by the way, which  is actually the second-oldest operating amusement park in the world. Anyway: In the meantime, the monster escapes the aquarium and roams into the countryside of Denmark, where he kills cows and ruins a family dinner. Kors i røven!

 

Reptilicus

 

What we have next is basically the whole Danish military force assembled to track down the monster with tanks, missiles, flamethrowers and all the firearms they could get their hands on. Yes, this shit gets real. When Reptilicus enters Copenhagen we see a handful of extras who jog with their hands in the pockets through the streets in full panic-mode as they’re smiling and giggling, and just being thrilled about having their fifteen-minutes-of-fame moment in a motion picture. General Greyson, on the other hand, is certainly not smiling as he’s sweating like a pig. The chief of the aquarium has two mild heart attacks. So no, this is no laughing matter.

 

Then we have the monster itself, which is exactly what you imagined: an e-grade Ray Harryhausen funny-looking puppet on strings who destroys miniature buildings of Copenhagen. And the reveal of Reptilicus is just, like Martin Scorsese would have said, absolute cinema!

 

As earlier said, the film was shot in two versions. But things were drastically changed after the Danish version had its first screening in its home country, where the film was just laughed at and got bad reviews. Well, what a surprise. The American distributors got very cold feet, looked at each other and said: We can’t release this shit. Look at it! So they brought Reptilicus back to the editing room where they removed several scenes, some of which where Reptilicus flying over a not-so-convincing silhouette over Copenhagen. Nothing looks convincing here though. And to make the monster look more threatening, some special effects were added, such as making the monster spit out green goo. And I honestly don’t know how to describe it. Just see for yourself.

 

Some quick scenes were added where we see Reptilicus eating some of his victims, which looks like it was directed by Terry Gilliam while he was having a stroke. Other scenes were cut out in the American version, such as a completely random scene where the mentally challenged caretaker is suddenly in a park, surrounded by a group of children and sings a song about Reptilicus. This guy is played by Dirch Passer, who was a big comedian in Denmark and an institutionalized figure at Saga Studios. So, of course, he had to be in Reptilicus, where he mostly makes funny faces and gets himself electrocuted after goofing around with an eel. The American version is also more fast-paced with less talk and more campy action, or in other words, more retarded B to Z-movie goodness.

 

So yeah, they pulled a Shelby Oaks here, only in this case these changes was done without Sidney Pink’s knowledge. And that made him pissed. So pissed in fact that his last name was changed to Red. But somehow they made the film worse and better at the same time. And this also seems to be the case with the upcoming Kraken (the first sea monster film from our home country Norway) which has been abruptly delayed to next year, by some very suspicious hush-hush reasons. So we just have to wait and see what that’s about and if Denmark will have the last laugh.

 

And there you have Reptilicus, the first and only sea monster spectacle from little Denmark. A must-see for fans or pure old-school schlock. Also lighthearted enough to work fine for the whole family. It’s available in 4K Ultra HD by Vinegar Syndrome where you get both versions and a cool poster.

 

Reptilicus

 

 

Directors: Poul Bang, Sidney W. Pink
Writers: Sidney W. Pink, Ib Melchior
Country & year: Denmark, 1961
Actors: Bent Mejding, Asbjørn Andersen, Povl Wøldike, Ann Smyrner, Mimi Heinrich, Dirch Passer, Marlies Behrens, Carl Ottosen, Ole Wisborg, Birthe Wilke, Mogens Brandt, Kjeld Petersen
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056405/

 

Tom Ghoul

 

 

 

 

The Woman in Black (2012)

The Woman in BlackThe year is 1889, and we’re in the village of Cryhin Gifford. Three little girls are playing in their nursery at the top floor of the house, when they suddenly notice a sinister presence in the room. Instead of running out in fear while screaming for their parents (as would be a normal reaction), the girls seem to come under the presence’s influence. They get up, walk towards the window, and jump to their deaths. Several years later, in 1906, we’re in London where the lawyer Arthur Kipps is waiting anxiously while his wife is giving labor. His son, Joseph, is born, but his wife Stella dies during childbirth. From one tragedy to another, just to make us aware pretty early on that this is a bleak and depressing story. Four years later, Arthur is still grieving and struggling, where his boss one day instructs him to visit Crythin Gifford in order to retrieve documents from the late Alice Drablow, who owned the infamous Eel Marsh House. Somewhat reluctantly, he travels there to find himself in a village where everyone is unwelcoming and suspicious of him, with the exception of the wealthy landowner Samuel Daily. The Eel Marsh House is located in a desolate marshland, where the pathway up to the place is sometimes inaccessible due to the high tides. Arthur also starts seeing glimpses of a mysterious woman in black, and each time he sees her, something terrible happens to one of the few remaining children in town. The townspeople blame Arthur, while Samuel tries to convince him not to fall into the superstitions of the villagers. But there are secrets at the Eel Marsh House that will reveal what really happened there, long ago…and it’s up to Arthur to make those secrets become unveiled.

 

The Woman in Black is a supernatural horror film from 2012, directed by James Watkins with screenplay by Jane Goldman. It is the second adaption of the 1983 Susan Hill novel of the same name, where the first adaption was made in 1989. This 2012 version stars the well known Harry Potter actor Daniel Radcliffe in the leading role as Arthur Kipps (which makes for a very special fun fact: in the first adaptation Arthur Kipps is played by Adrian Rawlings, the actor who played Harry Potter’s dad). The movie was produced by Hammer Film Productions, Alliance Films, Cross Creek Pictures and the UK Film Council. It did pretty well at the box office, grossing $129 million worldwide against a budget of $15-$17 million.

 

While there are tons of movies about haunted houses and vengeful spooks out there, there’s not all too many that really carries that dark, brooding, classic ghost story vibe. You know the type: the ones with large Victorian mansions, dark hallways, sinister secrets, and so on. This, however, is one of those movies. Danielle Radcliffe, most known for his role as Harry Potter of course, is doing a great job playing a tormented and grieving lawyer who gets tangled up in a dark and dangerous mystery. With the perfect brooding locations, using Cotterstock Hall near Oundle in central England for exterior shots of the Eel Marsh House, Osea Island in Essex for the fictional Nine Lives Causeway which leads up to the house, and the village scenes filmed in Halton Gill. It’s a beautiful looking film, drenched in gothic, gloomy atmosphere.

 

While this one and the first movie adaption from 1989 are very similar, they both have a few changes from each other and also compared to the book. And while this 2012 version has a lot more of the moody, dark and gothic atmosphere lingering throughout the entire movie, there were actually some scenes in the first movie that I honestly found creepier, especially the scene during the fog, which I found to be a lot more effective in its subtleness. Still, this one is focusing a lot more on the goth doom ‘n gloom vibe, which suits the film well being a Hammer production. After all, Hammer were pioneers in the gothic horror department.

 

The Woman in Black is a creepy, atmospheric and delightful ghost horror movie with a sinister vengeful spirit, an old village with unfriendly inhabitants carrying a secret, an old decrepit Victorian house as isolated as can possibly be, and so many other great ingredients for the perfect spooky haunting.

 

A sequel called The Woman in Black: Angel of Death was released in 2015.

 

The Woman in Black The Woman in Black The Woman in Black

 

Director: James Watkins
Writer: Jane Goldman
Country & year: UK, 2012
Actors: Daniel Radcliffe, Ciarán Hinds, Sophie Stuckey, Misha Handley, Jessica Raine, Roger Allam, Lucy May Barker, Alisa Khazanova, Ashley Foster
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1596365/

 

Original: The Woman in Black (1989)

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

The Woman in Black (1989)

The Woman in BlackIt’s the fine year of 1925 and the place is a chronic depressive England where it’s always gloomy and misty and extra cozy by the fireplace. Arthur Kidd (played by Harry Potter’s dad, Adrian Rawlings) is a young solicitor in his early 30s. He’s married and has two children who he has to kiss goodbye for a while when his boss sends him from London to a small sleepy Greendale’ish coastal town. The first assignment is to attend the funeral of the mysterious upper-class woman Alice Drablow. And she was not the most popular person in town as only three, or so, is taking the last ta-ta before she gets lowered six feet under. RIP. The townsfolk refuse to talk about her as if she was some Voldermort.

 

Now the tedious work starts. And that is to visit Drablow’s gothic mansion, called Eel Marsh House, located by itself on an isle with a tidal causeway, and go through a mountain of papers. The old mansion, overgrown with vines and frozen in time, looks more welcoming than it should, but it doesn’t take long before the bad vibes creep in.

 

We don’t see much of the woman in black, but we absolutely feel her stone-cold presence, although most of the film happens during the daytime. And it actually works as the surroundings are bleak and ghostly by itself, where it doesn’t matter much if you spot a ghost at night or in broad daylight. That’s England for you.

 

The woman in black is played by Pauline Moran, who could as well be the sister of Jean Marsh. When we first see her outside the house where she gets the first direct eye contact with Arthur, she eyeballs him right through his sorry soul with sadness and burning radioactive hatred. She has that look as if someone just bent over and gave a big, bubbly, wet bean fart straight at her face. And once you’ve got eye contact with her, you’re, more or less, marked for life and will never be the same again, somewhat similar to a certain cursed Asian VHS tape from the 1990s.

 

There’s also a family graveyard by the house. Not subtle at all. So, of course, this place is haunted. But there’s work to do. Arthur gets a cute little dog, Spike, to keep him company as he dives more and more into her papers, going through cryptic tape recordings, to finally settle down the Eel Marsh House.

 

The Woman in Black

 

Then the good boy gets worried, runs out and disappears in the thick fog. As Arthur runs after him, he only hears screams coming from everywhere and the sounds of horses galloping. So what’s he gonna do? Take the train back to London and tell his cigar-smoking boss with a straight face that he got spooked away by ghosts? Of course not. And when the work is done it will finally be time to go back home to London, and hopefully forget about that creepy woman in black. But she won’t forget about you. Never. And no, nothing bad happens to the dog, so chill down.

 

The film is directed by Herbert Wise, based on the novel by Susan Hill. The script is written by Nigel Kneale, one of the most prolific screenwriters in the UK at the time. This is not your typical ghost ride with jump scares, loud music and so on, and certainly not for TikTokers with a half-second attention span. The Woman in Black is a classy ghost story, a tragic one as well, told in the old-fashioned style as the mystery of this Alice Drablow is basically told via letters and eerie tape recordings.

 

The film is very slow-burn’ish at times where we have some slick and elegant long one-shot takes so we can get a real sense of the place. The mood and the somber, gloomy cold atmosphere are the strongest elements here where with clever use of sound design, especially during the thick fog scenes. I also find it more effective that we see most of the woman in black at a distance where her sickly face is more blurred and obscured, which makes her look way more ghostly and mysterious. Makes me think of the cover of the first Black Sabbath record.

 

The film is also known for that scene which alone was enough to ruin the whole Christmas for the Brits when it aired on the telly. The scene that really got me though, was the ending. So simple yet so damn chilling. As a low-budget movie made for TV, it surely looks impressive, still after 30-plus years, and the performances are solid.

 

Susan Hill was, of course, not particularly happy with the adaptation for small, eye-rolling nitpick reasons. One of which is that the screenwriter, Nigel Kneale, actually had the nerve to change the gender of Arthur’s dog! Ooof, oh my. Stephen King gives a pat on the shoulder as he relates.

 

After the film was shown on Christmas Eve in England 1989, followed by a quick VHS release, it disappeared, poof, like a ghost itself. It wasn’t until the 2000s that a DVD was released in Canada, a copy I bought myself before it eventually got out-of-print. The film finally got an official Blu-ray release in 2024 after a long, long, long copyright dispute. The rights were not owned by Susan Hill herself, but by a trinity of holy ghosts technicians: a make-up artist, a costume designer and an assistant director. What a headache.

 

The Woman in Black is also one of Guillermo Del Toro’s favorite haunted house films, which should be enough of a selling point. So don’t listen to me. The 2012 version, produced by Hammer Films with Daniel Radcliffe in the main role, is also a good one.

 

The Woman in Black The Woman in Black

 

Director: Herbert Wise
Writer: Nigel Kneale
Country & year: UK, 1989
Actors: Adrian Rawlins, Bernard Hepton, David Daker, Pauline Moran, David Ryall, Clare Holman, John Cater, John Franklyn-Robbins, Fiona Walker, William Simons
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098672

 

Tom Ghoul

 

 

 

 

Waxwork II: Lost in Time (1992)

Waxwork II: Lost in TimeWaxwork II starts immediately where the first film left us (spoiler alert if you haven’t already seen the first movie!) where Mark and Sarah are escaping the waxwork that’s burning down to the ground. While they board a taxi and get the hell out of there, we see that they’re not the only ones who were able to escape: the severed hand from the zombie exhibit is crawling out of the space, Thing-style, and follows Sarah to her home. There, we get introduced to her abusive a-hole stepfather, who gets killed by the zombie hand with a hammer. Who gets the blame? Sarah, of course, and then everything is turned into some murder-trial-defense scenario. Mark, desperate to save his girlfriend, tries to find a way to convince the jury that a zombie hand really killed her stepfather, but in order to do so he needs to prove that such a Thing exists in the first place, and thus Mark must travel through several worlds in order to gather evidence that can save Sarah. Aaand here we go into total sci-fi/fantasy/cosmic/something-something hodgepodge that only makes the slightest sense if you’ve been dosing on some magic mushrooms.

 

Waxwork II: Lost in Time is a dark fantasy comedy horror film from 1992, written and directed by Anthony Hickox who also wrote and directed the first film, Waxwork (1988). It premiered in the Philippines on March 26, 1992, and got a direct-to-video release in the US later that year despite originally having been intended as a theatrical release like its predecessor.

 

Like the first movie, there’s some familiar faces to see. Zach Gilligan reprises his role as Mark, the protagonist. David Carradine (well known as Bill in the Kill Bill movies) also has a role here as a beggar, and we have Bruce Campbell in possibly the best segment in the movie, shot in black & white which is a homage to The Haunting from 1963 (the segment even has the same title).

 

Overall, the movie is complete nonsense from start to finish. It’s a lot more goofy than the first, and paying tons more homages to horror classics of all kinds with more than a few nods to multiple fantasy films as well. Unlike the first film, there’s no Wax Museum here, just…portals to other dimensions or something like that, which are all homages to other films. And there’s sooo much here: nods to Nosferatu, Godzilla, Dawn of the Dead, Alien, etc. etc. Just like the first, it isn’t afraid to spill a bit of blood for us gorehounds, sometimes doused with a good amount of cheese, like the scene with Bruce Campbell getting his ribcage exposed, and Frankenstein doing a good old head-smashing with popping eyeballs and a brain flying straight out of the top of the skull. Great times! There’s also a rather lengthy medieval segment which does outstay its welcome a bit, but it’s also where most of the (nonsensical) story is progressing, and where the villain, Lord Scarabus, resides.

 

It’s hard to really get much into this movie plot-wise as it’s so all over the place and so silly and nonsensical that just trying to think too much about it makes me feel like my brain is going to take a flight just like in the Frankenstein scene. If you thought the first movie was too asinine for your taste, then gee whiz, are you going to have some trouble with this one…

 

Overall, Waxwork II: Lost in Time is a fun watch if you’ve already seen the first and can enjoy movies that are utter silliness. It’s got its fair share of charm and entertainment value despite being somewhat of a mess. One of the major highlights in the movie are the tons of horror references that’s bound to be a fun watch for most horror fans.

 

Waxwork II: Lost in Time Waxwork II: Lost in Time Waxwork II: Lost in Time

 

 

Writer and director: Anthony Hickox
Country & year: USA, 1992
Actors: Zach Galligan, Monika Schnarre, Martin Kemp, Bruce Campbell, Michael Des Barres, Jim Metzler, Sophie Ward, Marina Sirtis, David Carradine, Alexander Godunov, George ‘Buck’ Flower
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0105792/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

Waxwork (1988)

WaxworkTwo college students, Sarah and China, have a strange encounter with an odd gentleman who owns a mysterious wax museum and invites them to have a look at the exhibit. Later, they bring along with them some of their friends: Mark, Gemma, James, and Tony. The museum has a lot of morbid displays, but nothing suspicious about that, it’s just the perfect ghoulish fun any horror wax museum should have. But of course, there’s something sinister at play…and the college students soon find out that if they get too close to an exhibit, they will end up in a pocket dimension where the scene unfolds in real life. Tony ends up in a werewolf exhibit where he encounters a hunter and his son, who is there to kill the creature. There’s no surprise that this doesn’t end well for Tony. China is sent to a castle where none other than Count Dracula himself turns her into a vampire. Mark and Sarah, however, never gets too close to any of the exhibits, and leave the museum while wondering where the hell their friends are at. Soon, they both realize something is very wrong with the museum, and they even try to make the police intervene. You can probably guess how that goes. Still, the museum has a lot more in store for its visitors…a lot more!

 

Waxwork is a comedy horror film from 1988, written and directed by Anthony Hickox in his directorial debut. It is partially inspired by Waxworks, a German silent film from 1924.

 

Waxwork is a very good mix of horror and comedy, where the tone is overall very whimsical but also offers a nice amount of decent gore scenes. It’s quite campy at times, but that only works in the movie’s favor. The practical effects here are pretty good, which shouldn’t come as much of a surprise when Bob Keen was brought on board to work on the visuals effects. His special effects can also be seen in other horror movies like Hellraiser (1987), Lifeforce (1985), among several more. Like a typical teen-slasher, though, the movie is set up with a lot of teen characters you couldn’t really give a fiddle about. So don’t expect any great in-depth personalities or anything…most of them are just there to get killed off by the exhibits. There is also a pretty bonkers finale, filled with chaos and absurd fun!

 

Some familiar faces can be seen here, including Zach Galligan as Mark, who is most known for his role in Gremlins (1984), David Warner as the Waxwork man, known for his roles in many films and series, including Omen (1976), In the Mouth of Madness (1994), Ice Cream Man (1995) and many more. And there’s also Mihaly ‘Michu’ Meszaros who is most known for a full-body costume role where you’d never recognize him: ALF aka Gordon Shumway! Aside from some well-known actors, the movie includes a ton of references to many horror icons among the exhibits coming to life: there’s a werewolf, vampires, a Golem, a mummy, Frankenstein’s Monster, Jack the Ripper, and so much more! Even Marquis de Sade, a real-life french nobleman who was, and still is, notorious for his writings and from where the term Sadism stems from. Whether or not he was just a depraved monster or a misunderstood genius in a whole other debate, though, but in this movie he’s one of the major villains.

 

Waxwork is one of those 80’s horror movies where you just sit back, and more or less nods to yourself and thinking yup, this is one of those movies that could only have been made back in the day. Easily a typical comfort-horror. A nice 80’s horror film filled with nonsense of the fun and ghoulish kind!

 

Waxwork Waxwork Waxwork

 

 

Writer and director: Anthony Hickox
Country & year: USA, 1988
Actors: Zach Galligan, Jennifer Bassey, Joe Baker, Deborah Foreman, Michelle Johnson, David Warner, Eric Brown, Buckley Norris, Dana Ashbrook, Micah Grant, Mihaly ‘Michu’ Meszaros, John Rhys-Davies
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096426/

 

Vanja Ghoul

 

 

 

 

 

Phantasm III (1994)

Phantasm III What tha FUCK was THAT??

That’s… kinda hard to explain. 

 

Just like the previous one, Phantasm III, also known as Lord of the Dead BooooOOOOYS, picks up right after the previous ended. So no, it wasn’t all a dream, after all. Or maybe a dream within a dream…who the hell knows. Reggie gets out of The Tall Man’s hearse while it’s moving, all messy and bloody before the car suddenly explodes. Liz dies instantly while Mike (A. Michael Baldwin) survives but gets knocked unconsciously. Reggie and Mike get surrounded by the evil Jawas and The Tall Man, who holds the severed head of Liz. Reggie unlocks a timer grenade to just end it all. I don’t want him in pieces (Mike), The Tall Man says. Well, as it looks like now, that’s the only way he’s gonna get him. The Tall Man backs off before he tells Reggie to take good care of Mike while he waits.

 

Mike gets taken to the hospital where he falls into a coma. It doesn’t look too good, as he’s walking towards the light in a bright blue hallway among other dead silhouettes. And I’m sure I spotted Tangina and Kane for a second. But one particular sticks out. It’s… Jodi, Mike’s dead big brother, again played by Bill Thornbury. And he looks bored of his mind. After a quick reunion, Jodi tells Mike to stay away from the light and go back. The Tall man shows up and orders him with his strict boooOOOY line delivery to turn back since he wants him alive. Mike wakes up only to get attacked by a ghoulish nurse. Mike shoves a metal pipe through her neck. Reggie comes in and gets her yellow blood spurted all over his face. A sphere forces itself out of her scalp and flies in front of Mike. An eye comes out of the Sphere (yes, they have eyes now) to take a good look at Mike before it flies out of the window. WTF. Just another day in Phantasm land.

 

Mike and Reg drive away to find an abandoned house to take shelter for the night. Jodi pops up again and transforms himself into a sphere. Why? Who knows. Reg is fed up with the bullshit and just wants to shoot it right away. Can’t you hear it? It’s Jodi. He’s in the ball, talking to me, says a robotic and not-so convincing A. Michael Baldwin. This is certainly not the same Baldwin we saw in the first film. His replacement from Phantasm II must have broken him. And now that Mike finally stands on his feet again, The Tall Man walks in to claim him. It’s time now, boy! Jody, or JodySphere, gets transformed by a rusty useless ball by The Tall Man, before he and Mike disappear into a dimension far, far away. Reggie takes JodySphere with him, drives through abandoned ghost towns, once again in Supernatural-style, with his 1971 Cuda to track down The Tall Man and save Mike.

 

A. Michael Baldwin’s return as Mike gets rather cut short as the plot takes a complete detour with a bloated but entertaining sideplot where Reggie joins forces with the boy Tim (Kevin Connors), the tough nunchaku chick Rocky (Gloria Lynne Henry) and gets some bumps in the road by a small gang of scavengers. The aspects with Tim is pretty fun though, as he lives alone in his house after his parents got killed by, yeah you guess it, The Tall Man, and rigged the whole place with death traps and small escape doorways. The idea with Tim could have worked as a movie by itself or a spin-off. There’s an awkward non-romance moment with Reg and Rocky at a motel where he gets tricked into having some kink time in handcuffs, only to dupe him so she can have a good night’s sleep. Then we have the obligatory mausoleum scenes where spheres show up and make a bloody mess. The spheres have gotten more upgrades, like eyes used as surveillance cameras, and they also have Homer Simpson-sized brains that are small enough to fit.

 

After the previous film underperformed, Don Coscarelli was back on the independent playground. Whether that was for the best or worse, is another question. Bringing back A. Michael Baldwin and Bill Thornbury was an obvious choice now that Coscarelli was free to do what the hell he wanted. Just too bad that the chemistry between the two brothers is like two wet socks. Things are far from what they once were in 1979, and not just with Baldwin. I bet that Coscarelli got cold feet, tossed the brothers in the backburner, rewrote the script and placed Reggie in the front seat with brand new colorful characters.

 

As a direct-to-video, Phantasm III looks pretty polished with some fun action, wild car chases, explosions, gore, zany sci-fi moments, nods to Sam Raimi’s Evil Dead and, overall, what makes a great Phantasm film. It doesn’t have much of the spooky atmosphere as the first two, but is still an entertaining ride with lots of 1990s charm. The leftovers of the bigger WTFs get saved for the last 15 minutes or so, where we only get more cryptic questions than answers just to open the doors for a quick cliffhanger. And honestly, the franchise could as well just have ended here, because the next two installments we got are just … bollocks. If you thought that these films weren’t confusing enough, you’ve seen nothing yet.

 

Just to quote The Tall Man himself: It’s Never Over!

 

Don Coscaralli followed up with Phantasm IV: Oblivion four years later. The only significant thing we get is a quick backstory to The Tall Man, which isn’t that interesting. Some regard this as the best in the series, for some reason, and others as the worst (that was until we got the fifth film). My main issue is that this is just a dull movie that tries to go back to its roots with a slowburn pace that goes nowhere. Poor Reggie gets a flat tire (if I remember right) and has a long dull fight scene with a zombie cop. And Mike? He’s… somewhere.

 

There’s no set-pieces here, just the empty desert environment of Death Valley, where Mike just drives through the dark ether, sleeps in the car and walks aimlessly in the sunny desert as if he is just having an existential midlife crisis. And maybe that’s the case. What the hell do I know. The leftover scenes from the first film, that were used for time traveling, could be a great idea if we got some more than just dead meat and fillertime to close the whole blurry mess with It was just the wind.

 

Then, after 17 years, we finally got Phantasm: Ravager. And, oh man… The plot here is that Reggie is withering away in a nursing home with dementia where he dips in and out of dreamland where we follow him in different random scenarios to look for Mike… even though Mike visits Reggie regularly while he’s lying in his bed and looking confused. And drawing the parallels between the real Reggie Bannister’s unfortunate health condition makes this even more sad. Melancholia isn’t an unknown thick layer for the Phantasm universe, but this is just depressing, in a bad way. Another day in Phantasm land or not, I wanna go home now.

 

We have lots of terrible green screens in the most classy SyFy Channel-style, where you’re almost expecting David Hasselhoff to pop out and sing Hooked on a Feeling any minute. This is the worst kind of fan fiction slop one can shart out. Ravager was originally meant to be a series of short films with no other ambitions than dump it on YouTube. And it clearly shows and explains everything. The film was directed by David Hartman, and I’m a little shocked that Don Coscarelli actually was involved with the writing process here. Angus Scrimm died some months after the film was released, at the age of 89. RIP.

 

Sorry for closing the Phantasm reviews with such a sour note, but it is what it is. Watch the first three. They’re great. That being said, keep the balls in the air and peace out.

 

Phantasm III Phantasm III Phantasm III

 

 

Writer and director: Don Coscarelli
Country & year: USA, 1994
Also known as: Phantasm III: Lord of the Dead
Actors: Reggie Bannister, A. Michael Baldwin, Angus Scrimm, Bill Thornbury, Gloria Lynne Henry, Kevin Connors, Cindy Ambuehl, John Davis Chandler, Brooks Gardner, Irene Roseen
IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0110823/

 

Prequels:
– Phantasm (1979)
– Phantasm II (1988)

 

Tom Ghoul