The teenage girl Lucie (Chloé Coulloud) lives in a small sleepy seaside town where she has her first day as a care-worker, assisted by Catherine. One of the posts is in an old, overgrown mansion owned by the ghoulish-looking old lady, Jessel (Béatrice Dalle), who rots in her bed while breathing through a ventilator in a coma. We learn that she was once a sadistic ballet instructor, but most importantly, she has a key around her neck that is rumored to open a treasure hidden somewhere in the house. And Lucie is keen to get her hands on the treasure so that she and her boyfriend can look forward to a better future. She also lives at home with her father after her mother committed suicide, and their relationship is tense.
It also happens to be Halloween and what could be more appropriate than spending the night treasure hunting in a big old house? Lucie, along with her boyfriend and another guy, enters the house from a basement window and sneaks into the bedroom to get the key, and… well, it doesn’t go so smooth from here on, as they get trapped inside the house like a survival-horror game after they encounter the “treasure” which isn’t exactly what they expected.
So this is the follow-up to Inside by the french duo Alexandre Bustillo and Julien Maury. If you expect another rerun with non-stop violence in the purest New French Extremity ways, you might get mildly disappointed. Livide relies more on dim atmosphere surrounded by an old Victorian mansion filled with dust, cobwebs, probably a strong odor of mold, and some obscure history from a dark, twisted fairy tale. And I would recommend wearing shoes with some strong soles as the basement is filled with trash, clutter and whatnot from floor to ceiling, which makes Ed Gein look like a compulsive cleaner.
And with Inside, Livide and The Deep House, it’s fair to say that the duo is at their right element when it comes to haunted house scenarios. While their scripts aren’t always their strongest side, they surely know how to create a creepy, eerie, and sometimes claustrophobic atmosphere. Livide works mostly as a visual treat where the inspirations from Italian horror filmmakers Argento and Bava shines through as it slides further into a deep, vivid gothic nightmare. It’s gloomy, melancholic and poetic with an experimental third act, to say the least, and the ending is always open for interpretation. And yes, there’s gore. And it tastes delicious. Just be a little patient.
In this 80s inspired horror-comedy, two friends perform a ritual to try and help make one of them cool enough to get a date with Brenda. Instead, they get a demon.
We Summoned a Demon is a fun and gory horror short! Directed by Chris McInroy, who also made the horror short Death Metal from 2016.
Director: Chris McInroy Writer: Chris McInroy Country & year: USA, 2017 Actors: Kirk C. Johnson, Carlos Larotta, John Orr IMDb:www.imdb.com/title/tt7285002/
Ben Rolf and his wife Marian and their 12 year old son Davey travels to a remote mansion because they’d like to rent it for the summer. Greeted by the home’s owners, the elderly siblings Arnold and Rosalyn Allardyce, they quickly realize that these old geezers are more than just a little eccentric, bordering on being outright cuckoo with a weirdly strong attachment to their home. Which makes it kind of strange that they’d like to rent it out in the first place. And the price is quite the bargain too: $900 for the entire summer. It comes with one odd requirement though: there’s an old lady in the upstairs room, which the family must promise to deliver meals to during their stay for the summer. They’re told that this old lady wants privacy and most likely won’t be seen, and that they should just leave the meals outside her locked bedroom. Nothing fishy about that, right? While having a few second thoughts, the family still decides to rent the wonderful house, and along with them they bring Ben’s elderly aunt Elizabeth. When they arrive back at the house, the siblings have already left the place, having left a note at the door. And while all seems like the setup for a wonderful time, the house appears to make some of them behave rather oddly. Marian becomes obsessed with cleaning and caring for the house, and making sure that the elderly woman upstairs is being fed. Despite never actually seeing her, or even hearing a word from her. She distances herself more and more from the family, while Ben starts being haunted by the visions of the creepy hearse driver he once saw at his mother’s funeral when he was a child. And he starts behaving aggressive, especially towards his own son. What was first thought to be a wonderful summer holiday at a beautiful house, soon turns out to be a nightmare…
Burnt Offerings is a horror film from 1976, directed by Dan Curtis and based on the book by the same name which was written by Robert Marasco. The filming took place in 1975, in the historic Dunsmuir House in Oakland, California. This film was the first to be shot at this location, and many horror fans will probably recognize the house as it was used in the horror film Phantasm some years later. Several movies have been filmed there, and the latest being Delirium from 2018. Dan Curtis mentioned that there were no sets built for this film, and everything was filmed entirely on location. Something that feels oddly refreshing to watch these days…
The film is a typical old-fashioned haunted house movie, with a very slow build-up and devoid of jumpscares. You feel something is off from the very start without having anything specific to pin it on, there are no obvious ghosts or ghoulies which terrorize the family, so you’re not really sure what is happening to them. The film is very much about mood and atmosphere, with a beautiful old-fashioned home providing the perfect environment for such a setting. Despite being your typical slowburner, it constantly throws things at you which keeps you constantly on edge and wondering what’s going to happen next. Especially unsettling is watching how Marian keeps distancing herself entirely from her own family, only caring for the house and becomes obsessed with keeping it clean and in order, and staying outside the old lady’s room upstairs while watching an array of old photographs and playing the melancholic tune of the music box on the table there.
The family characters, although somewhat generic, fits their role pretty well as the ordinary middle-class family, and the siblings we meet at the start of the movie (played by Burgess Meredith and Eileen Heckart) were perfectly eerie-kooky. While the film portrays a somewhat strained relationship between the wife Marian (Karen Black) and the elderly aunt Elizabeth (Bette Davis), it’s worth noting that there may have been more than just acting between those two. According to Bette Davis, these two had conflicts during the shoot and she thought Karen’s behaviour was disrespectful and unprofessional. However, Bette also expressed a disdain for Oliver Reed (who played Ben), and referred to him as “possibly one of the most loathesome human beings I have ever had the misfortune of meeting”. I’m going to suppose the atmosphere in that house wasn’t all chipper in real life either…
This movie isn’t particularly well known, despite horror authors Stephen King and Bentley Little having both acknowledged that it influenced their writing, and Stephen King was apparently inspired by both the book and the movie when writing The Shining. I’m also thinking that he probably let his son Joe Hill (Joseph Hillstrom King) watch the movie as well, considering how the creepy hearse driver in the movie gives off real Charles Manx-vibes (NOS4A2). This character was not included in the original novel, actually, but was based on an actual childhood experience of Dan Curtis, where he recalled as a young child being at his mother’s funeral and seeing a chauffeur laughing outside of the funeral parlor, something he found disturbing and which then stuck with him ever since. There are some other scenes in this movie as well which makes me wonder if several other horror films have taken inspiration from it, including a certain scene which will ring a bell or two for those who have seen Evil Dead.
Overall, Burnt Offerings is an interesting addition to the haunted house genre, and derives a bit from the ordinary spookhouse story. Some may find the ending a little cheesy, but it’s kind of what makes it a bit exceptional and also make the title fit very well with what’s actually going on.
Director: Dan Curtis Writers: William F. Nolan, Dan Curtis Country & year: US, 1976 Actors: Karen Black, Oliver Reed, Bette Davis, Eileen Heckart, Lee Montgomery, Dub Taylor, Joseph Riley, Todd Turquand, Orin Cannon, Jim Myers, Anthony James IMDb: www.imdb.com/title/tt0074258/
Lord Emerson Blackwood is a renowned 19th century wildlife painter, who lives in a huge manor called Blackwood Manor. One day, he bludgeons his housekeeper to death in the basement, and afterwards he removes her teeth. Not only that, he also removes his own teeth…and offers them as some kind of sacrifice to a bunch of mysterious creatures living inside the old fireplace, who has kidnapped his son. The creatures reject his offer, and tell him that they only want the teeth of children. And then, just like his son, he also gets dragged in by the creatures. Fast forward to present day, we meet 8-year old Sally who moves into Blackwood Manor with her father Alex and his girlfriend Kim. They want to restore the old manor for a client, to have it put on the market for sale. Very soon Sally gets to hear and see glimpses of the teeth-craving creatures, who are eager to finally get some of those children’s teeth they want…
Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark is a supernatural horror film from 2010, directed by Troy Nixey as his feature directorial debut, and written by Guillermo del Toro and Matthew Robbins. It is a remake of the 1973 ABC made-for-TV film of the same name. In the original Sally was the wife of Alex, not his daughter, but this change kind of fits well for the more apparent fantasy-theme this remake has been given. And yes: obviously, it has Guillermo del Toro’s fingerprints all over it.
With the movie’s opening there isn’t much of a mystery plot going on, as we already know that there are some creatures living in the house which craves for human teeth, or specifically those from children. Thus, we already know the mansion is infested with ghoulish tooth fairies. We do find out a little bit more about them as the mansion reveals some of Lord Emerson’s secrets, which includes some of this paintings. Despite a lack of actual mystery, the atmosphere is one of the focal points in the film, blending the gothic mansion interior and exterior with the fantasy aspects and making it spookily fun. As for the monsters themselves, they’re…well, not exactly very impressive. They’re the standard CGI fantasy creature, fitting in a fantasy plot more than a horror one I guess.
Now, the original from 1973 is by many deemed a classic, and it appears to have given lots of kids the willies when they saw the movie sometime in the 70’s, and according to del Toro it also gave him quite a fright when he watched it as a child. A remake is bound to not have the same effect, especially when also changing the perspective from a grown woman to that of a child. It works pretty well, but it does of course change the tone of the story quite much. And since Guillermo del Toro was involved in this, I guess that there were also some people expecting a new Pan’s Labyrinth or something, which it is definitely not. It’s a typical movie that plays primarily on childhood fears, mixing in some bits from the world of mythology and turns it into something sinister, but not as dark as what can be seen in the aforementioned film. Overall, I still think it’s a well made gothic fantasy-horror movie, with enough spooky atmosphere to be enjoyable.
Director: Troy Nixey Writers: Guillermo del Toro, Matthew Robbins Country & year: US, 2010 Actors: Katie Holmes, Guy Pearce, Bailee Madison, Bruce Gleeson, Eddie Ritchard, Garry McDonald, Carolyn Shakespeare-Allen, Jack Thompson, Julia Blake, David Tocci, Lance Drisdale IMDb: www.imdb.com/title/tt1270761/
Mr. Holybar (the local chocolate bar priest) makes a late visit to Lolli’s home. Her daughter Twizzly, is usually such a sweet girl, but lately, has been acting healthy.
The Exortwist is a fun animated parody based on the famous The Exorcist, and here it’s got a twist (pun intended).
Director: Laura Koval Writer: Loren Baskin Almazan, Laura Koval Country & year: USA, 2021 Actors: Jordan Haro, Nicole Kurdziel, Sami Martinez IMDb:www.imdb.com/title/tt15766132/
There was actually a time when films like this were called plagiarism. Today we call them remakes. And call this specimen of celluloid what you will, Pazuzu, however, has already left the building and dived straight back to hell to suck Saddam Hussein’s big hairy toes rather than being near this eyesoaring madhouse.
There’s little to zero trivia info to find about this Turkish obscurity other than it’s more or less a shot-for-shot remake of The Exorcist – a movie from 1973 you may have heard of. The film was apparently shot on a low budget, resulting in a grainy and poor image quality. You don’t say. To call the image quality grainy and poor is the biggest understatement since the beginning of human existence. I would first assume the film was shot on used toilet paper with a dirty lens covered in fresh urine and projected straight out of Belphegor’s asshole.
And you couldn’t ask for a more honest plot summary to add on the backside of the DVD cover:
– After the worldwide success of William Friedkin’s 1973 classic film The Exorcist, those wacky Turks decided that maybe they should steal the script and make their own homegrown version of the film. The result is Seytan, a one of a kind viewing experience. If you’ve seen the 1973 original you’ll feel you’re experiencing déjà Vu as this version is almost an identical scene by scene remake of The Exorcist, albeit with a Turkish soundtrack, music recorded directly off a record player, editing most likely done by a blind monkey and special effects more fitting for an elementary school play. Combine this with really grainy film stock, some out of work (possibly homeless) unknown Turkish actors, horrible direction and a budget of about $1.95 and you’ve got yourself an instant classic. –
There are some story changes here though. Instead of Father Damien Karras, we have the young author Tugrul Bilge, who’s just written a book about black magic titled Seytan. And one of the readers of that book is the twelve-year-old girl Gül, while she also plays with a spirit board. And instead of Captain Howdy we have Captain… Lersen. Gül gets possessed by Lersen and her mother contacts Bilge after she discovers his book. Although Bilge is a non-believer (u-oh), he gets invited to have a look at Gül as she’s bedridden and wearing some cheap make-up, a big Tina Turner wig and mumbles with a comical demon voice that sounds more like a drunk, old Japanese samurai. And yes, of course, The Exorcist himself, an old gentleman with a white-trimmed santa beard, eventually pops up to conjure holy forces in the big climax.
The funny thing is that both Gül and Tugrul sound like some sinister stage names from a black metal band, while Lersen sounds more like a regular Joe.
And forget about any obscene cussing like “your mother sucks cocks in hell” and “let Jesus fuck you!” The most edgy written piece of dialogue we get is “I will kill you”. In other words: I highly doubt that anyone who saw this back in 1974 in the Turkish cinemas went out of the movie shaking with trauma, and had problems sleeping the following night. The masturbation scene is still here though, in its own unique way, along with the head spinning sequences, the possessed furniture, the medical examinations, Karra’s Bilge’s sideplot with his mommy issues – but with the momentum like a quick fart in the wind, and the emotional depth as deep as a puddle on the sidewalk. It’s amateur-hour all the way and like a piss-drunk karaoke version of something very familiar performed by Eilert Pilarm with the tunes from Mike Oldfield’s Tubular Bells constantly on repeat throughout the first half of the movie, ripped from a tired cassette tape, to remind us that this is… The Turkish Exorcist. Burp.
The acting is as laughable as you’d expect, but I have to give the girl who plays the Turkish Regan some cred as she tries her best and seemed to have a jolly fun time during the making of this looney tune. She also got the pleasure of spitting some green-something in the old man’s face.
Seytan never got any official physical release, or not that I know of, other than a DVD bootleg in 2007 by Substance, ripped from a VHS added with subtitles which even Google seemed to struggle to translate. Fun shit. It’s of course also on YouTube with a more cleaned up image quality but without the subtitles.
Director: Metin Erksan Writer: Yilmaz Tümtürk Also known as: Seytan – The Turkish Exorcist Country & year: Turkey, 1974 Actors: Canan Perver, Cihan Ünal, Meral Taygun, Agah Hün, Erol Amaç, Ismail Hakki Sen, Ekrem Gökkaya IMDb: www.imdb.com/title/tt0072148/
Take a bunch of obscure deleted scenes from E.T., Poltergeist, and some unreleased haunted house movie made by Disney TV, stitch them randomly together with little to no context – and then you have Making Contact, written and directed by Roland Emmerich. Yes, the “master of disaster“ himself who gave us Independence Day.
And no, Making Contact, which Emmerich made eight years before his global breakthrough with Stargate, has nothing to do with making contact with space or aliens. I don’t exactly know what the movie is trying to make contact with… A cohesive plot it is certainly not, and I don’t even think that a young, struggling Roland Emmerich knew. He just wanted to make an entertaining movie, according to the film’s wiki page. And entertaining it is, but mostly for the wrong reasons. And that’s always something I can appreciate.
The film centers around the young kid, Joey, who’s just had his dad buried. Why, what or how, we never get to know. The same night, while he’s in his room, the house gets haunted by… something. All the toys start to move and a red-glowing toy phone in his closet starts ringing. On the other end is his dad, or that is what we’re supposed to believe. We’re only some minutes in when I can already picture this as one of the many unofficial sequels that got spewed out of Italy during the 1980s. And if that was the case here, this would be released as Poltergeist 2, without any questions.
Joey and his mother also happen to live next door to the same house from the Psycho films. Here it’s condemned and ready to be demolished. One day, Joey goes for an exploration in its cobwebbed basement, where he finds a ventriloquist dummy. The dummy’s name is not Norman Bates but Fletcher, and we soon learn that he’s possessed by a demon or something which should rather be locked up in a blessed cage in the occult museum of Ed and Lorraine Warren.
Weird, supernatural shit also occurs at school where an egg rolls by itself over a ruler from one table to another. Some girls’ pigtails start to float just out of the blue… and when I thought I’d seen it all: instead of a bunch of chairs stacked up on each other in the kitchen, we have some sharp knives stuck in the kitchen cupboard.
Making Contact is a weird mesmerizing mess that can never decide what direction it wants to go with a tone that bounces all over the place. There’s a side-plot with the demon possessed-whatever doll that never gets explained. The other kids in Joey’s class set up a plan to kill him because…because. Joey suddenly has telekinetic powers. Scientists set up a lab at Joey’s house. Kids are running around in Norman Bate’s huge underground basement where a big hamburger-shaped monster pops up, and some other ghoulish creatures for a quick moment. The top of a big maze can be seen in the distance and I wonder if there’s a shrine in there as well. The visual effects look like scraps from Mr. Boogedy.
Almost the entire cast is of non-actors who’s only appeared in this film, most of which are Germans while the shooting took place in Germany, Virginia Beach and at the backlot of Universal Studios in California where the exterior of the Psycho house is located. The film got English dubbing for its DVD release with a new musical score which sounds very familiar to a certain John Williams. And now I’m almost tempted to claim that Steven Spielberg actually ghost directed the film in some bizarre alternative universe while he snorted lines with Tobe Hooper. Because the more I think of this film the more confused I get.
Making Contact is obscure for a reason, but the weird and goofy nature of it, and if not considering who’s directed it, makes it more of a morbid curiosity and something to at least have some fun with. Emmerich followed up with the horror comedy Ghost Chase, aka Hollywood Monster, in 1987 which is even more nuttier.
Director: Roland Emmerich Writers: Roland Emmerich, Hans J. Haller, Thomas Lechner Original title: Joey Country & year: West Germany, US, 1985 Actors: Joshua Morrell, Eva Kryll, Tammy Shields, Jan Zierold, Barbara Klein, Matthias Kraus, Jerry L. Hall Jr., Sean Johnson, Christine Goebbels, Ray Kaselonis IMDb: www.imdb.com/title/tt0089378/
Miriam is the only survivor of a twisted game her own father set in motion, which left her siblings killed in horrible ways. She is brought to the hospital, where a supernatural entity, the “Gamemaster”, offers her the opportunity to re-live that event from the beginning, and maybe change the outcome since she would then be armed with the knowledge of what is about to happen. She decides to do so, hoping to save her siblings from their own father’s cruel and twisted plans. And so, once again she’s together with them in their father’s high rise building because he asked them all to come. And he once again reveals that he’s got a brain tumor that is inoperable, and that he’s going to die soon…and then continues to tell them how awful disappointments they all are. Will Miriam be able to stop the murders from happening all over again, or will it be just as bloody as the first time?
To Your Last Death is an animated action horror film from 2019, directed by Jason Axinn and written by Jim Cirile and Tanya C. Klein. It was 114% funded on Indiegogo in 2016, with a total of $52.713 raised before the film went into production. At first, this movie felt a bit strange to watch with the pretty stiff puppet animation together with the realistic cartoon style, somewhat reminiscent to the show Archer, just a bit less polished. But I got pretty quickly used to it. It gives off a comic-book art style, and there’s even some scenes where there are comic book panels, so it was obviously made in order to replicate the graphic novel style. I also liked how they used Ray Wise’s character (the father Cyrus DeKalb) to look exactly like him. The voice casting is also excellent, with several well-known names such as Morena Baccarin and William Shatner. Bill Moseley (who plays Otis in the Rob Zombie movies House of 1000 corpses and The Devil’s Rejects) also has a voice acting role here, and he’s got the voice of one of the villains (no surprise there).
The story is a little bit like Groundhog Day meets Saw, and does it indeed get bloody and vicious at times! The evil businessman’s contraptions to have his own offspring killed is pure Jigsaw-esque in style and depravity, like how one of them needs to fill a bucked of blood by cutting themselves over and over again, or else they will get decapitated. Ooooh, messy! Aside from delivering on some very graphic kill scenes, it also offers enough tension to keep you invested throughout the movie.
To Your Last Death will definitely not be everyone’s cup of tea, and even though I liked the animation style I can understand that some people might be put off by it, at least for the 1 and a half hour duration. Still, it’s a pretty fun watch and quite fast-paced. There’s a lot of violence and gore, so gorehounds should start wagging their tails to this one.
Director: Jason Axinn Writers: Jim Cirile, Tanya C. Klein Country & year: US, 2019 Voice actors: Morena Baccarin, William Shatner, Damien C. Haas, Bill Moseley, Ray Wise, Mark Whitten, Benjamin Siemon, Bill Millsap, Florence Hartigan, Dani Lennon, Tom Lommel IMDb: www.imdb.com/title/tt3748918/
Liz, a young student, disappeared for 18 days along with some of her friends. She resurfaces, disheveled and bloody, and in order to find out what happened to her and her friends she is interviewed by a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist, Dr. Phillipa Horwood, listens as Liz recounts the story about how her friend Martin arranged for her and her friends Mike, Geoff and Frankie to spend a weekend in an underground nuclear fallout shelter. They are totally trapped inside the shelter, as it cannot be opened from the inside, but of course that won’t be a problem since Martin will come back for them. For some reason that doesn’t happen, Martin doesn’t return to let them out, and when the teens realize they are trapped down there, they start turning on each other. Things go from bad to worse when they uncover hidden microphones in the shelter, apparently placed there by Martin. Liz claims that one morning, the hatch was suddenly open, allowing her, the only survivor, to escape. Everything sounds straight forward and such, but the psychiatrist is skeptical of Liz’s account of the events, and suspects there’s more to the story than what she’s been telling her.
The Hole is a British psychological thriller from 2001, directed by Nick Hamm and based on the 1993 novel After the Hole by Guy Burt. At the first look, it may appear to be a typical teen slasher, which is very far from being the case. It’s a psychological horror thriller about a bunch of rich prep school kids in England who wants to skip a field trip to Wales, by staying in an underground shelter for the weekend. Things go bad, and we’re presented with a twisted tale where the first half appears to be pretty straightforward, but then it’s progressing into a mystery that slowly unfolds. While it may not be too much of a surprise that there’s more to Liz’s account of events than what she’s been telling the psychiatrist, the movie also offers some tense scenes of how the spoiled youngsters react when they’re locked inside the shelter. There’s no doubt that the characters are supposed to come off as rather selfish and with an incredibly entitled attitude, making it hard to root for anyone. In this regard the performances are solid enough to keep the tension up, as they all turn on each other in full desperation.
While The Hole offers nothing groundbreaking, it’s still a pretty decent watch. The use of non-linear storytelling does keep you guessing for a bit, switching between current time and flashbacks, but it’s not like the “twist” at the end is that unpredictable. It’s still a well made mystery/whodunnit thriller, with a realistic tone and a claustrophobic setting which adds to the dark atmosphere.
Director: Nick Hamm Writers: Guy Burt, Ben Court, Caroline Ip Country & year: UK, France, Canada, 2001 Actors: Thora Birch, Desmond Harrington, Daniel Brocklebank, Laurence Fox, Keira Knightley, Embeth Davidtz, Steven Waddington, Emma Griffiths Malin, Jemma Powell, Gemma Craven IMDb: www.imdb.com/title/tt0242527/
The teenage girl Lucie (Chloé Coulloud) lives in a small sleepy seaside town where she has her first day as a care-worker, assisted by Catherine. One of the posts is in an old, overgrown mansion owned by the ghoulish-looking old lady, Jessel (Béatrice Dalle), who rots in her bed while breathing through a ventilator in a coma. We learn that she was once a sadistic ballet instructor, but most importantly, she has a key around her neck that is rumored to open a treasure hidden somewhere in the house. And Lucie is keen to get her hands on the treasure so that she and her boyfriend can look forward to a better future. She also lives at home with her father after her mother committed suicide, and their relationship is tense.
